#god i could ramble for hours about them but im gonna stop while im ahead

[princeyam]

champions of my heart

[probably-haven]

Hello!! After seeing what you wrote about xiaoven fics I went to see what things you usually write and omg, your archon Venti headcanons????? I am absolutely in love. So if it isn't annoying, could you talk about xiaoven or Venti or Xiao or whatever ship or character you like? I don't care what you are going to say, I just want to know more about your thoughts ^^

I- is this... bestie, this is essentially a free ramble pass- kerujsgheskdfug. Trust me when I say that in no way is this, and in no way will it ever be annoying in the slightest- i literally- lets just say rambling off thoughts is kind of my specialty, especially when provided a topic to branch off of because otherwise I'm just- really indecisive about it so- iujskdh yeah- 100% definitely down to talk about Venti, Xiao, and/or Xiaoven XD. Also, yes- it may have been awhile since i last posted one(cuz again, indecisive about which direction to take part 5), but the Archon War Era Venti headcanons are still without a doubt my favorite posts I've made. It's just such an interesting topic with such endless potential that so few people actually think about or consider or even realize is there, so i always just get really psyched whenever i see someone interact with them lol.

.... this ended up being a bit of a mess: warning in advance

Anyway! onto the actual content!

- You see the thing about Xiaoven is that there's a lot of different ways that it could end up working out, and just personally my favorite way of portraying Xiaoven in my mind is as an unlabeled relationship because if anyone in genshin would give off that vibe its these two. And a number of other reasons.

- Firstly, I heavily headcanon Venti as being an aroace polyplatonic or perhaps heavily demiromantic. However, regardless of this I just don't think that Venti is really the kind of person to worry about how he should label his feelings, thinking it's silly to try to put them in one box or the other, especially with feelings and emotions being as fluid as they are in general. Plus it fits his whole God of Freedom vibe. I just- dont think he's the biggest fan of labels or social categorization in general.

- And secondly on the hand of Xiao... his defense mechanisms are very much ingrained in his personality. It's probably hard enough for him to not go into fight or flight(the answer is fight) at the slightest affection at first, at the slightest feeling of vulnerability. Even further down the line, with his fierce dedication to Liyue, I cant help but get the vibe that the moment he recognized that he was falling for Venti he would begin avoiding him, not only to avoid distraction from his duty, but to avoid corrupting him or losing him in general like he has with like basically every other person he gets close with(even believing that the cycle had repeated once more when he first heard of Morax's death)... now imagine Venti tryna slap a label on their relationship and tell me Xiao would have a positive reaction.

- The thing with Xiaoven.... honestly, i feel like theres more ways that it can go wrong than it can go right, but if they do manage to make their relationship work out, it's just simply beautiful in all terms of the word.

- Lets talk about killing. - During the Archon War, both were forced to kill a large number of people and gods alike- Venti out of a need to remain alive to protect Mondstadt, it's freedom, and the nameless bard's legacy by extent- and Xiao out of servitude to the god that was once his master

..... actually- break here- ive talked a lot about Venti on this blog but I havent actually spoken about Xiao all that much- so i should probably do that a bit first... do note though that my characterization of Xiao is pretty flexible actually- this is just- the possible characterization of him that i tend to favor as being the most- uh- "realistically complex"

-

Theres a line I saw this one time in a certain story: "He is a trained weapon. That's what he is, was, and always will be. You cannot change that so stop trying." And i just- think its a really interesting concept- that applies pretty well to Xiao now that i actually think about it. - the concept behind it is this: After spending more than a vast majority of his life killing or otherwise in battle, it's become a part of who he is, a normalcy that after centuries and centuries would be near impossible to get rid of or reverse, and even if it was possible, with his karmic debt constantly eating away at him its unlikely he has enough time left for that to happen. - it sounds like a cruel thing to say about him- but in context it's actually pretty layered and i think about it a lot. It's not as much a "he's a killer lol, that his whole personality" its more of a "The centuries of trauma he experienced have conditioned him into a constantly alert and battle ready mindset while also shaping his dehumanizing inferior-in-worth-but-superior-in-capability view of himself that would have likely been necessary to get through those time, and at this point he's been under that conditioning for long enough that it's essentially ingrained itself in his personality."

- the main idea is- it's a part of who he is, that needs to be accepted as who he is because its not something that he can just up and change. It's not all he is of course but his constant battle mode, as though always waiting to be ambushed or to be granted a new target to eradicate.

a couple character story quotes:

-"His past of service under the evil god had rid Xiao of his innocence and gentleness. All that remained within him was the means to kill and the weight of his sins. The only way he could be of service to mortals was in combat." -"Xiao does not feel any hatred. Having lived for over two thousand years, no single karmic debt constitutes anything more than a fleeting memory. No grudge can last a thousand years; nor is any debt so great that it cannot be paid off in this time. Xiao has spent many long years alone. But his battles have never been in vain." -"where did Xiao have to return to? He was merely leaving the battlefield." -"since Xiao wages a constant war against dark forces powerful enough to devour Liyue in its entirety, any bystanders who witness him in the heat of battle are likely to end up as collateral damage." -"The war he fights can never be won, and will never come to an end." -"Because ultimately, the one with whom Xiao wrestles is himself."

i feel like at some point this very nearly did consume his whole personality, almost turning him into nothing more than a being of slaughter under Morax's control, devoid of any "humanity" at all, consumed and corrupted by his karmic debt like his fellow yakshas before him. - until he experienced a moment of clarity- a song in the wind, the peaceful melody of a dihua flute. - and pulled back from the border of something he wouldnt have been able to return from, there a was a shift in his mind- a concept grown unfamiliar enough with time that it took him a great time to identify what it was; a curiosity. Something that there was no place for on the battlefield, something that by all means should have been completely useless to Xiao, and yet he held onto that curiosity, slowly regaining over time, a sense of who he was and who he could choose to be with each song that the wind chose to carry towards him every once in a blue moon.

and eventually that curiousity turned to longing. Longing "for a day to come when he will wear the mask and dance — not to conquer demons, but to the tune of that flute amid a sea of flowers"

...... uh- heh- if you couldn’t tell already i have a tendency to make my characterizations/analyses of characters more serious that i probably should. 

to summarize: Xiao is constantly toeing the line between his ingrained nature and his humanity- almost as though still trying to decide how much of that humanity he deserves to have, how much he is allowed to have, and how much is safe to have.

^looking back after writing this, i think the best way to explain it is that this is the view that i keep in mind/the lense that i tend to most enjoy looking through and refering back to while examining and/or analyzing his character, actions, story, lines, and overall personality.

idk- i kinda got off track but i just think its a really interesting interpretation to think about because it has some really interesting implications ig- it’s not the full extent of how i view him of course, but i kinda got ahead of myself and its long enough as is so ill just elaborate as i go- Lol i actually have in progress playlists for both him and venti and just- vibes- i could ramble about the playlists alone for hours explaining everything... It’s probably a problem- uh- ill keep going now lol.

anyways! stepping off the angst path for a brief break! Brought to you by their lines in the snow: both waiting for it to get thick enough, Venti for the purpose of a snowball fight and Xiao for the purpose of a tasty and nutritious breakfast.

but its actually something of note that Xiao doesnt actually need to eat so anything he does eat is usually out of obligation or enjoyment- so like.... snow.... like i dont blame him, but of all things- an adeptus who refuses to eat basically anything but almond tofu looks at the freezing-cold-floor-water that yeeted itself from above and decided at some point- damn- that seems more edible than basically ever single actually edible thing ever.... im gonna eat it- like- im glad if eating snow makes him happy but- at the same time...

He probably convinces Venti to eat snow too though and Venti wouldnt even resist I mean he’s wind and has probably consumed worse things in his time so- 2 anemo cryptids with glowing tattoos sitting in Dragonspine monching snow in the dead of night is an amusing thought to me.

- kay, now back to more serious-toned thoughts

One of the things about the ship that i really like is the different contradicting parallels between them:

A lot of how i view Xiao’s character is someone formed largely by the things he cant control and who was forced to accept that accepted that and learned to thrive in it as much as he can.  Venti on the other hand is surrounded by things he cant control and is ever adapting to control as much as he can while embracing whatever he cant as being part of the unpredictability of the world, seeing beauty in it. 

both of them have lost people and do what they do to honor their memory: Xiao continues to do what the Yakshas once did And Venti chooses to do what his friend couldn’t

Xiao’s power coming from himself  and Venti’s from others And both seem to appear to use their power for their own gain while truly helping others behind the scenes

both have killed a lot of people during the archon war Xiao views it as another necessary event out of his control and Venti would likely view it as a tragedy he chose to enact himself

and this is where we meet out balance

Xiao- contrary to how i think a lot of people view him as thinking of himself as a monster- seems canonically to have accepted this as part of his duty, as long as those he killed are not mortals. I dont think he enjoys it no- but someone has to do it and he’s just accepted that its a part of his duty Venti on the other hand-

See the beauty of the ship- as someone with an angst-centric mind- is this- these are two of the most traumatized mfers in the game 

Xiao is by far the one who needs the most help and who can serve to benefit most from the ship- but he is nowhere near self aware enough to recognize that there’s anything wrong or unhealthy about his mindset in the slightest-

whereas you have the contrast with Venti who sorted through most of his trauma with the nameless bard alone during the archon war and while the result appears more healthy- is still really not- but he’s not self aware of that either because i mean- who’s going to tell him? nobody even knows. 

however- venti is aware enough to notice flaws in Xiao’s mindset and “Venti” enough to want to help them through it-

Xiao- while not aware enough to recognize the flaws in Venti’s mindset, can recognize where it contrasts with his own, and is blunt enough to point it out- and then it’s out there to be mulled over- 

they’re so similar and yet so different and a feel just conversing between the two of them, being in each others precense, just being exposed to two mindsets that are so very different could do both of them a whole lot of good.

GEEE THAT BIT OF RAMBLING HAD LITTLE TO NO DIRECTION AT ALL- LET ME-- LET ME MAKE THIS START MAKING SENSE- WITH... DYNAMICS OR SOMETHING

I don’t think Xiao needs to sleep really- and i dont think that sleeping would do anything except make him uneasy at first- he’d probably just get nightmares after all he’s been through- but with Venti he would soon learn that it doesn’t have to be that way, lulled into the first peaceful sleep he’s had in... as long as he can remember.

anywho back to not making sense cuz im fickle and i think most questions about ships are best displayed through character interactions so like- a possible exchange thats cliche but cliches exist for a reason

Xiao: Why do you try so hard to help me, it isn’t easy. I know that much Venti, with the most adoring expression: Because you’re worth it, obviously Xiao: But surely there are others more deserving of- Venti: No Xiao, everyone is just as deserving as the next person, you included Xiao: Then why me above others? Venti: ehe, cuz ur my warrior of course [O//////O oh shit, hes right] Xiao: My contract is with Morax alone [gay panic but in broody yaksha]

it’s kinda difficult cuz neither of them really address their feelings.  I mean Venti does but he does it very indirectly and its rare that he ever does it with like- genuine directness- even spilling his backstory was in the form of a song- and told in the third person- so a lot of their interactions would often have some deeper meaning, especially with Venti being the bard he is. 

I come up with a lot of- errant thoughts about Xiaoven- but this is making me realize that a true analysis of their ship is rather difficult because it just encompasses so many dynamics so its hard to settle on just one and not go rambling about who knows what bouncing from one end of the ship to the other-  Because you truly can and thats the beauty of it

within one moment you can be having a heartfelt conversation about the archon war the impact of lost friends and times past, and the next moment Venti is trying to forcefeed Xiao an apple while Xiao screams about disrespecting the adepti and its just- so lovely

so while they have picnics with nothing but apples, dandelion wine, and almond tofu they can sit down and talk about the dreams Xiao once devoured, and the dandelion wine and apple cider that the first Ragnvindir invented from the plants that never could have grown in Old Mond. The foods that tasted of familiarity, or of the grilled ticker fish Pervases always used to eat, foods that tasted of friends and frankly family that had since passed, glaze lilies and cecilias and qingxin flowers scattered in the surroundings and woven into Xiao’s neat braids and Venti’s now messy ones, rebraided by the steady and inexperienced hands of one unused to gentle action. 

and then of course Venti steals Xiao’s tofu once the mood becomes too grim and replaces it with a bottle of wine that Xiao refers to as “vile poison,” a remark that fatally wounds Venti as he collapses on the floor, proclaiming how he can only be healed by a Yaksha’s kiss. Xiao ignores this of course and simply takes back his tofu with a slight smile on his face, but as Venti persists he soundlessly places a kiss on his own palm before intertwining their fingers and pulling him back up from where he was dramatically sprawled on the floor, grumbling about how such action was “unbecoming of an archon.” A sign of affection only Xiao would ever know about. But Venti is literally wind and I hc his senses work differently anyways so he definitely knows- plus Xiao’s face is red as the blood of his enemies and the way he is pointedly not looking at Venti at all really speaks volumes anyways. 

 -Venti playing epic battle music whenever Xiao goes into fights in what looks like a ridiculously extra performance to anyone else but is actually doing wonders to keep Xiao’s karma at bay

-Venti preaches the practice of “kissing wounds better” and Xiao is unfamiliar with this medical treatment but views it as unnecessary regardless because adepti have accelerated healing, doesn’t mean he’s going to stop him though. 

-Messages whispered on the wind

-Venti’s 1000 year sleep- an accident, not a fun time for the yaksha, and not a fun time for Venti once he woke up. Venti is actually more afraid of restful sleep than Xiao is, hence the sleeping in trees thing, but when Xiao is there, he can sleep restfully with faith that Xiao wont let another millennia slip through his fingertips. 

- Xiao tends to make excuses when doing things that aren’t necessary to his duty, like in his birthday voice line “Have this, it’s a butterfly i made from leaves... Okay. Take it. It’s an adepti amulet -- it staves off evil” because at the current point in his progress it helps him to feel like he’s allowed to do these things. Not wanting to put him off from progress, Venti never comments on his excuse but never fails to whisper a quick reminder of how proud he is of how far Xiao had come.

- Xiao’s karma saddens Venti greatly- not only because of how it effects Xiao but also because its a reminder that as much as Venti tries to honor the memory of those he’s killed, there will always be those who resent him for it, and when he took the option of living away from them, he truly can’t blame them. - And when he gets too wrapped up in thoughts, whether around this topic or similar ones or otherwise, eventually, he’ll hear the sound of a flute on the wind. It’s not divine by any means, but as his own wind connects him to the source, he gets the sentiment all the same. “What impact does one individual’s remaining wrath have on the present. You have done much to help the living in the present” the unspoken idea that Xiao has included himself in that statement, because now, with Venti’s help he’s beginning to learn just how to experience living for himself. 

- Venti’s form and Xiao’s mask are off limit topics though because if either mentions it the other will counter with the opposite and the mood will turn immediately bitter at the idea that both know that what they’re doing is destructive but neither are willing to change

- Venti who has different tells for negative feelings than most people because as much as he likes to pretend it is- this form isnt his, and Xiao who is able to identify those

- many fanfics and headcanons have Venti recognizing when Xiao is uncomfortable and getting him out of those situations. I see that and I love it but i raise you: - Venti taking Xiao to Mondstadt, careful that he doesn’t get to the point that he’s uncomfortable. And nothing goes wrong exactly, but Xiao notices the the way Venti’s cape is blowing in the wind, the way he’s holding his weight, barely on his feet so much as floating on the wind, connected with the ground only for the sake of appearance, all the while he looks just as happy go lucky as ever. And without a word, he grabs his hand and teleports them both out of Mondstadt.  - turns out it was just a slight thing that reminded him of the archon war (cuz i will die on the hill of him having more tragic backstory than just Decarabian), and he of course gives a sincere if not flustered thanks to Xiao, because he’s really not used to people noticing. 

- Venti trying to vent sneakily through fictional stories and Xiao is just like “Didn’t that basically happen to you” and Venti is just like “<_< shit”

- Venti once said affectionally that he wished he had met Xiao sooner and Xiao immediately and seriously shot it down by saying “If you had, I would have been forced to kill you” and both of them now stay up at night wondering who would have won that fight, not sure which result would have hurt more. (because honestly I have no idea who would win in that fight and that terrifies me- I like to think it would have been one of those legends that end with “and the fight persists to this day” or something along those lines)

- “How long have you been together?” “Adepti have no need for-” “1000+ years T^T how dare you deny our love” “O///O our...? ...useless”

- its disney- let me explain- i have this- i have this headcanon inspired by watching too many animatics- - so venti has a human form that isnt his- which he would have had to get used to moving in- and he’s a bard- - uh- anyway- as a third degree black belt in mixed martial arts, i can speak as an authority on this(not really an authority since i havent gone since quarantine but lets pretend). We have a thing referred to as the big three(most things do), and those things are martial arts, gymnastics, and dance. The idea is that they reflect really well off of each other and the best in any one category are good in all three. Timing, balance, form, discipline, technique, hand-eye coordination, grace, ease of motion, they all play a part- anyway-

- Venti taking Xiao’s prowess in martial arts and acrobatics and teaching him how to dance, and as someone who’s extremely skilled in the first two, the third comes easy to him, almost naturally. And it’s delicate and beautiful and lovely and it isn’t hurting anyone. And Venti points all these things out and more and despite how much Xiao insists that he feels ridiculous he truly does enjoy it and it goes a long way towards helping him form more healthy views of himself and his worth.  - Verr Goldett walked in on him once and made a joke about performing at the inn. unfortunately Venti was there and agreed on Xiao’s behalf before he could protest and- and it wasn’t as bad as Xiao thought it would be... he still wouldn’t do it again though without reason, but with good enough reasoning he could probably be convinced. 

- anyways point is he likes dancing to Venti’s songs and i just think that’s really cute - just picture the idea that all the animatics you see actually have the potential to be canon- ugh

- venti tries holding something out of Xiao’s reach since he’s taller and Xiao just fucking teleports 

- both need their space but when they dont, all they have to do is speak the other’s name and they’ll be there.

- and because i just had to.... love languages

- lets start with Xiao- i don’t think he’d view acts of service or quailty time as a love language tbh, and he blunt but really bad with words so affirmation is out, leaving gift giving and physical touch. However, he seems to view most material things as meaningless so- - Xiao who’s love language is in his fleeting touches, something he’s only recently grown comfortable with because of Venti, and now is giving back, which he knows he doesn’t have to do, but that he want’s to, though he’ll still continue to make excuses for each one. “you were shivering” “The inn is high up, you could have fallen..... I said what I said, you’d question an adeptus?”

- and as easy as it is to say words of affirmation for Venti- he does that for everyone- i want to say his is actually acts of service - its the acts of service that let him see just how much Xiao has progressed afterall, from teaching him to dance, to playing another song on the flute, to supplying him with the almond tofu he seems to enjoy so much. Every little thing he does helps Xiao to grow and he couldn’t be happier about that. 

-

- of course most of my headcanons for the ship do take place latter into the relationship because- y’know the less serious unhealthy vibes allow for greater range of thought, but i do still love to think about the serious implications so i kinda hopped back and forth. So sorry about how messy it is btw, i kinda- got carried away- it kinda got some kind of structure near the end tho so- maybe it’s okay. anyway- back to... lol something, we’ll see where thought forests lead. 

[svnaslove]

silly, red lacy thing. II

𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭; Oikawa x fem!reader friends, to friends w benefits that start developing feelings for each other [short fic]

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 ; suggestive themes

MASTERLIST | PART I | PART III

6 days later, Saturday

you’d just walked in, melting to the warm air inside the café making a thrilling difference to the chilly air outside. you cold tip of your nose and cheeks seem to melt to the warmth. being early as usual from all the other guys, you went ahead and chose where you wanted to sit. taking a seat in the first booth right next to the window where you could see them come. you figured that as you waited you could just go on your phone until someone arrived.

if only this was the first time you had been early. if only it hadn’t been a known fact that you were always there first. if only oikawa didn’t come in early too to return to you your lacy little things and tease you again since the last time you had encountered. if only iwaizumi didn’t start feeling bad about you always being late and thought of wanting to come earlier for you so you wouldn’t have to wait so long.

if only.

“hey princess.” an all too familiar voice rang out to you after hearing the bell dinging, signaling that someone new had entered. you put your phone down to look up to the smug face of the pretty boy with his big coat on, already taking it off to the warm gust inside.

“don’t call me that, tooru.” you responded flatly going back to your phone.

“ohhh c’monn, but you’re so pretty and sweet, i wanna call you something.” he smiled sitting next to you.

“call me by name like you’ve always had.” you responded, inching a bit closer to the window to get away from him, his confident aura was too much. just him sitting there next to you, was already making you slightly blush.

“oh? okay, well i guess i won’t give this back.” he whispered pulling out your red lacy, cheeky underwear.

your eyes widened and cheeks heated up, before you could yell at oikawa and hit him for pulling it out so publicly you heard the dinging of the bell of the entrance and heard another, oh so familiar voice.

oikawa and you both froze, the silly lacy red fabric still in his hands right in front of you. both looking at the newcomer.

“what the hell is this?” iwaizumi asked, eyes uncoming from the two of you and the fabric between you.

before he could say anything else makki and mattsun walked in, oikawa quickly hid you underwear in the pocket of his coat before they could notice it.

your cheeks flushed a violent red. this was so embarrassing. it was already embarrassing enough having oikawa pull it out in a public café. what was worse was iwa seeing it, and only him. and now, you were to endure sitting right across from him for at least and hour or two as you all caught up with each other. makki and mattsun both to their unknowing of the tense atmosphere that was about to grow.

“heyy guess who’s finally on time??” makki laughed walking in. “we were talking to hajime about how you’re always so early and you had to wait for us and we thought we’d just come early too for you.” smiled mattsun taking a chair across oikawa and makki sitting at the end of the table. iwaizumi’s glare was something terrifying. his aura became deadly. he slowly sat down in the chair across from yours, not breaking his eye contact with oikawa to only give you the scolding look every once in a while.

you felt so embarrassed, the atmosphere was tense enough to be cut with a knife. if iwa hadn’t been there, oikawa would’ve been cocky as hell, but there was one thing oikawa tooru feared in the world and it was the wrath of  iwaizumi hajime. although you could sense that oikawa wanted to smirk. he truly was trying to keep it from showing, but it was slowly creeping into his features. and it didn’t help that he was sitting right next to you. inches from each other. he noticed more than anyone how red your cheeks were of embarrassment, how nervous you were by looking at you how you were fidgeting with you fingers. he whispered a quick sorry to you when the others weren’t looking and it seemed as if he really did mean it. it seemed. did he mean it?

the energy around the table felt tense. your heartbeat wouldn’t slow down and you were too nervous to barely talk to the guys. another of the worst parts was that oikawa had sat right next to you. and it almost was like oikawa’s fear of iwa was seeping away.

oikawa’s hand slowly made an unexpected trace to your thigh that earned you a high pitched yelped from you, your cheeks still warm and blushed from the beginning. at least you could blame it on the weather, that the cold had done this. “y/n, are you okay?” asked makki putting down his phone after declining a call. “hmm? oh yeah im fine, im good, im great, it’s just that my drink’s really hot, is yours too hot too?” you rambled. 

“um, mine’s okay.” he responded, he knew something was up. you had been friends with these four for too long for them not to notice when something’s up. “are you nervous about something?” mattsun asked, noticing the way you were averting your eyes. oikawas’ hand was reaching further to the inside of thigh, you shut your eyes tight. you knew he was enjoying this. he was enjoying how embarrassed you were and how you could get these small reactions from you.

“yeah princess, what are you nervous about?” oikawa asked smirking, his eyes had the same clouds as your last encounter.

your eyes met with his. you seemed like you couldn’t move a muscle. this was too much. 

“princess?!?!?” makki and mattsun both spit their coffee at the same time. “what the hell do you mean princess tooru.” laughed makki, thinking this was all a joke.

“oikawa.” iwaizumi sternly looked at him, his gaze had flames seeping of them. 

oh shit.

iwaizumi just called him by his surname. 

“y/n you’re switching seats with me.” he said and stood up to take your seat.

you nodded silently and stood. when you two crossed paths he held your shoulder and whispered, “come outside with me?”

you followed him like a lost puppy outside, forgetting your own coat inside. 

the chilly air hit you and the tip of your nose started getting cold again.

“here, take me coat.” iwa said handing it to you.

you gratefully took it and wrapped yourself in the huge coat of his.

maybe it didn’t help that the rest of the guys could see everything that was happening since they were near the window, but it didn’t matter.

“okay, we’ve all been your best friends for a long time,” iwa started, “you do know i care about you right?”

you nodded, a bit of confusion making it’s way to you, you thought you were going to get scolded.

being an only child yourself, it was nice having someone like iwa, sure you had the other guys, but iwa was the only one that really acted like an older brother to you. he protected you and was there for you and comforted you until you were ready to stand again. you loved him.

“i need to ask you this. i may have only seen a hint of what is happening between you and oikawa but from what i see in your reaction i feel like you’re not comfortable with him at all anymore.” he continued.

you eyes were trained on his, listening to all he had to say. after all, you deeply respected him. yet there was still a hint of confusion in you.

“it might be none of my business, but i don’t care because i care about you as if you were a little sister to me. so i need to ask you. is everything between you and oikawa consensual? he’s not forcing himself on you is he? you know you can tell me right?”

your eyes teared up as you heard why iwaizumi seemed so tense. you threw your arms around him over his shoulders on tippy toes and hugged him tight. “oh hajime.” you laughed weakly. “thank you for being so concerned.” you said. you pulled from the hug, still wrapped with each other and held his face. “what’s going on between me and oikawa is 100% consensual i promise, he’s just,,, horny all the damn time and tries to get me flustered too much. but i promise it’s all in my consent.” you laughed.

relief warmed into iwaizumi’s face and he smiled a bit, “thank god, i’d kick his ass if it weren’t.”

you laughed and hugged him again, “i know you would.”

still embraced with each other in the side walk, you called out to him. “hey haji?”

iwaizumi hummed a response, “y’know i love you right?” iwa’ heart warmed, “yeah, yeah i love you too y/n.”

you pulled from the hug and looked down to the floor, “although... after we had started doing what we did, i started having feelings for him and i don’t think he reciprocates them. he thinks it’s all for fun and it kinda hurts, i’m gonna stop it soon i think.” a sad expression briefly took it’s place in your face. 

“hey,” iwa called, you looked up to him, “if he doesn’t have feelings for you too, he’s a jerk.” iwa said, giving you a smile. “but i will support you in whatever you decide, okay? although i might still beat his ass no matter what.” he added. you laughed and iwa laughed with you. “let’s get back inside” he said and opened the door for you.

the little bell ringed again as you two entered inside and you two were met with the ghostly impressions of oikawa, hanamaki, and mattsukawa. “what the hell was that?” hanamaki asked. 

“what’s next you too are gonna make out at the table?” mattsun asked.

oikawa sat quietly at the table, looking at his hands.

you confidence, recently drowned by oikawa’s flirting came back to life after talking to iwa, you shot a glance at the two, “shut it.” you said, taking a seat where iwa was previously.

having returned to yourself without the pressure of oikawa’s flirty presence you started feeling more comfortable again and started talking for the remainder of the hour and a half with them. laughing at each others jokes and stories and giving each other advice and remembering the old days at aoba johsai like you always did.

the atmosphere of the five of you was more relaxed, although you were still nervous about how oikawa would return your lacy things back to you. there was no stopping him, you knew he was going to be all cocky while returning it.

you glanced up at oikawa who had been a bit quiet and notice him staring at you, his cheeks coating a small pink when you catch him. weird. he never blushed. he was the one doing all the provocation and getting you flustered. 

“hi are you all ready for the check?” a waiter asked as they picked up the finished dishes on your table. 

oikawa fished into his pocket and pulled out his wallet into his hands, “yes, we’re ready,” he turned to the rest of you, “i’ll pay for it this time.” he smiled.

“what? no, what do you mean, we always cut the check into fours.” mattsun protested as the waiter walked away. 

“i just want to treat you guys” he smiled, mattsun grumbled, he didn’t like owing people things no matter how well he knew them or how many favors he’s done for others. makki was contempt, and had no complaints which made you giggle a little. iwa was puzzled but was already planning to pay for the next time, maybe they should do this sometimes? you looked at oikawa, puzzled, why would he offer to do that? it’s out of character for him. oikawa looked to you and smirked and sent a wink to you causing you to hide your face in your hands.

oh.

that’s why.

you watch as oikawa signs a check with a smirk on his face. 

that bastard.

and you hated yourself for all of this.

because of your damn crush on him and how he made you feel.

“ok time to go, i have a family gather up in like 2 hours, it was great talking to you all” smiled makki standing up.

all of you stood up and headed outside, all gathering together in the sidewalk to talk before parting ways.

oikawa stood next to you, and makki and mattsun in front, iwaizumi was still behind in the café, he had to use the restroom.

“who’s going to your gather makki, if your aunt is going i wish you the best of luck.” laughed oikawa. makki’s aunt was known for being crazy in the way that she started stuff and always got everyone in arguments.

makki laughed, “oh no, she’s not coming, thank goodness.”

mattsun turned to makki to say something about his uncle when all of the sudden you felt oikawa reach and placed his hand on your back pocket, leaving your lacy underwear hanging from it. he leaned down to your ear, his hot breath forming small clouds as he spoke in the cold air, “there you go princess.” he whispered.

you snapped.

it happened before you could hold yourself back.

you grabbed the front of oikawa’s shirt and pushed him against the wall. maybe you weren’t as strong as him or as tall but you took him by surprise and he feel to the wall to your grip like a doll.

“what the hell is your problem, do you always have to tease me?” you screamed to his face.

makki and mattsun were shocked and confused watching what was happening in front of them. their eyes traced down and saw the lacy red hanging from your back pocket that oikawa had placed there and their eyes widened.

“i-” oikawa started, but you interrupted him before he could finish, “shut up oikawa, just shut up!” you yelled, letting go of the front of his coat and stomping away, pulling the underwear from your back pocket to hide it in one of your inner pockets of your coat.

the doubt started to fill your head.

should you have done that?

were you right?

did you hurt his feelings?

even though oikawa acts the way he does, you know he’s rather sensitive.

you tried to convince yourself that you did the right thing, you backed him off.

it’s what you needed to do to keep him away from hurting you. 

you had feelings for him and you knew he didn’t.

right?

you were just saving yourself from heartbreak.

right?

there was no way he felt the same way....

right?

you opened the door to your car forcefully and threw yourself in, slamming the door shut and turning it on.

you saw oikawa running towards you, his hair and coat flying behind you. he mouthed words that you didn’t understand, were they... im sorry?

you didn’t care. you turned the car on and drove out of the parking place, tears prickled your eyes. you didn’t care. you just wanted to go home.

you saw iwaizumi run up to him, you turned your window down slightly to hear as you drove, unfortunately being stopped by an unmoving car in front of you.

“what the hell oikawa, what did you do to her?” iwaizumi yelled, about to pounce at oikawa in the case that he had hurt you somehow.

oikawa put his hands up to defend himself, were there...tears in his eyes?

“stOp-” his voice cracked due to the pressure and emotion rising to his throat, “i-” a strangled sob fell from his lips and his arms fell down to either side of him, his posture slacked and a tear fell down his face that he quickly wiped away. “i love her okay? i love her and i hate myself because i don’t know how to act around her, i lover her.”

iwaizumi stopped in his tracks, his face softening and he looked at you in your car.

a car honked behind you to keep driving.

“just-” “just leave me alone.” oikawa cried as he turned around and headed towards his car out of sight as you were forced to keep driving.

he didn’t know.

he didn’t know you saw and heard all of that.

you heart squeezed and you felt butterflies uncaged into your stomach.

was this real?

you bit back a small smile but then you remembered how devastated he was.

did he think he lost you?

you still drove home.

you needed to think.

taglist: @oikawasiwa @helloalex80 @kaispaced @misssugarless​ @kookies3 @littlenymphia700 @glassykaashi @stargaze-issei @tsukiibaka @sakusagas @tobiovic​ @mikumikurali​ @ji-yuu​ @yatoatyourservice​ 

[slashersteve]

Some Kind of Disaster

pairing: Steve Harrington/Female Reader, Past!Billy Hargrove/Female Reader

summary: Reader and Steve have been together for a few weeks now, and she runs into a person she had a fling with once. That person was Billy Hargrove, and it’s the first Steve’s hearing of this.

warnings: swearing, Billy being a douche saying douchey things, Steve being cheeky and cute (is that even a warning), sexual themes and mentions

note: my good friend @dearneverlander​ gave me this idea in my time of need and assisted me in figuring out the asshole language, you’re a life saver, really. also if you’re a billy stan im sorry but i am not so he’s bad in this- also this is a no upside down au so the mall is still open

***

(y/n) was leaning against Steve’s car in Starcourt Mall’s parking lot, the window cracked open a little as the car shook. An older couple walked by when the car jerked and someone cursed. They looked at the car, then gave (y/n) an odd look. 

“Hi, how are you all doing tonight?” (y/n) asked, crossing her arms, they didn’t reply and kept walking, she turned and called, “Steve, would you hurry up, we’re going to miss the movie!” 

In the car, Steve was struggling to put on his jeans as he replied, “We can miss the previews, don’t worry!” (y/n) grumbled and leaned back on the car again. 

“I don’t see why you have to change, I don’t mind being seen with you in your scoops uniform,” she stated, Steve scoffed. 

“I mind,” he said, finally getting his pants on and buttoning it. He opened the car door now, she grabbed it and pulled it more open for him, revealing her boyfriend, hair an absolute mess. He leaned downward to put his shoes back on, then looked up at (y/n), who was just staring at him, he smirked and said, “Stop checking me out or we’re going to miss the movie.” (y/n) blinked and rolled her eyes as he got out, and locked and closed the door. He held his hand out for her to take. She took it, their fingers lacing together as they returned to the mall for their movie date.

At this time of night the mall was still quite packed with shoppers, they had to navigate through the crowd while still holding hands to make it to the theater. (y/n) had bought the tickets earlier in the day so they wouldn’t have to wait in the long line and just go in and pick their seats. 

Because it was a late showing, and on a school night for those still in school, she was hoping it wasn’t so packed so they could get their back row seats and kiss a little without someone to her immediate left or something. 

They were a few weeks into their relationship, so it was fairly new and she’d never been in an actual relationship before, hadn’t even thought about it until she started to talk to Steve, someone she liked to avoid in high school, because her closest friend Robin worked and they became friends. Of course, that meant they had to see each other often, and one thing led to another, and here they were, standing in line at the snack bar holding hands while he whispered about how he can’t wait to pretend to watch a movie when they’re actually going to make out. 

God he made her so happy.

“Down boy,” (y/n) said as they approached the cashier, Steve stuck out his bottom lip then chuckled as he pulled out his wallet. 

“It’s payday, get whatever you want, I’m buying,” he said smugly, (y/n) was going to decline and pay for it herself, but then he added, “Also you paid for the tickets so it’s only fair.” 

They got a large drink to share, a medium popcorn, and some licorice. Steve grabbed the peanut M&M’s, setting them down on the counter and said, “I know you’re going to make me go buy you some in the middle of the movie.” 

“You know me so well,” (y/n) said as he winked. They got their snacks, and started to walk towards the theater their movie was being shown in. Steve walked a little ahead in order to open the door for her, (y/n) was about to enter when someone got in her way, leaving the theater. 

“Oh sorry-” she started to apologize but stopped when she saw it was Billy Hargrove. Instantly her face flushed, she hadn’t seen him since she quit her life guard job at the pool when she got the job at the GAP, it meant more hours, more money, and less sitting in the sun. Thinking of the time she spent with him there made her inwardly cringe, and the surprise then smug look in his eyes said he was reminded of it too. 

“Are you going to move Hargrove or are you going to stand there like an idiot?” Steve deadpanned, letting go of the door, not wanting to hold it open for that guy. (y/n) took a step large step back, and Billy pushed the door open, glancing at Steve then at (y/n) incredibly amused.

“Well shit, are you two here together?” he asked, (y/n) put on a straight face and Steve didn’t hide the look of distaste on his features. 

“None of your damn business, get out of the way,” Steve said, Billy licked his lips as he looked at (y/n), making Steve clench the drink in his hand tightly. 

“You know I’m a better time than him, (y/n),” he smirked as her eyes widened, he reached out and almost touched her chin, to which Steve dropped the candy in his other hand, and instantly caught his arm, shoving it aggressively back down. 

“Back off, Hargrove,” Steve growled, Billy chuckled. 

“What are you going to do about it then Harrington?” he taunted, Steve’s face hardened angrily. (y/n) reached out and put her hand on Steve’s shoulder, saying, “Steve, come on, he’s just being an asshole per usual.” She glared at him, Billy clicked his tongue and she sucked in a breath in an attempt to keep her temper as ease. 

Steve eased off when she did so, and nodded, (y/n) didn’t give Billy another look as she walked by him with head up high, Steve shoved Billy in the shoulder when he walked in. 

The previews were still playing, and just as she suspected there was hardly anyone in here, scattered across the theater. They chose to see in one of the side seats in the corner, (y/n) by the wall and Steve by the aisle. 

“I can’t fucking stand him,” Steve grumbled angrily as they sat down, “He doesn’t know when to to shut his damn mouth.” (y/n) chuckled nervously and nodded. 

“I agree,” she replied, still feeling her heart beating out of her chest. Steve looked at her, and tilted his head curiously because he noticed how timid and overly annoyed (y/n) had become, plus she wouldn’t look at him, just staring blankly at the screen. 

“Hey, did he really bother you because I can do something about it you know,” Steve said as he wrapped an arm around her, (y/n) leaned into him and replied, “Oh-no, well yeah- but uh-” She wasn’t sure what to say, not wanting to tell her boyfriend who happens to hate Billy like she did, if not more, that she hooked up with him not once, but twice during her time as a life guard. Once in the showers after hours, another in his car in that same week in front of her house. After that one week, they made out once or twice and she started, much to her dismay, like him. Of course, she found out he was hooking up with another life guard the same time as her, and she stopped seeing him. He said some stuff to her, ones that pissed her off for months. God she hated him, but not more than she hated herself for allowing herself to sleep with him two times.

Steve stared at her, clearly seeing her struggle to the find the words, it took Steve a moment to figure out why, and when he thought he did, he raised a brow and said, “What did he mean when he said that you knew he was better than me, which we know is a lie,” he added, (y/n) half-smiled at that because it was true, “Did you two used to date or something?” He said it in a joking tone.

(y/n)’s smile and eyes fell and so did Steve’s small grin. 

“Oh...oh shit,” Steve said, blinking rapidly and looking down for a moment to take in this new information. (y/n) perked up and looked back at him, “We didn’t date, it was just- it was stupid and- it was before I even met you, well officially anyway! I haven’t talked to him since, oh god you’re gonna think differently of me-” 

Steve shook his head, “No- why would I? I mean, I hate the guy, but I’m not going to judge you on your past uhhh relationships? I mean- it was Billy, which is-” 

“Oh god you are judging me and I don’t blame you,” (y/n) almost cried, Steve shook his head once more. 

“I’m not!” he said, perhaps a little too loudly because the group of teens sitting a few rows in front of them turned around, Steve cringed and turned back to (y/n) who had her hands in her hair, completely embarrassed, “Hey, you’re with me now, I don’t care who you were with in the past, even if it was Hargrove.” 

(y/n) dropped her hands down to her lap, and let out a sigh, “That’s good to hear, just you need to know that it was nothing, and I absolutely can’t stand him too.” 

“Then why did-” 

“It was a dark time okay, it was so hot, I was probably dehydrated or something, I don’t know,” she was rambling now and Steve chuckled, leaning in to kiss her on the lips. 

“I got it, we all make mistakes,” he teased, (y/n) smiled weakly and nodded, “Let’s just forget about it and watch the movie, or whatever scenes we can watch when we take a break from this.” He caught her lips in his again, making her melt in her seat. His kisses always managed to take her breath away. He leaned away slightly, and she nodded dreamily. 

“Okay,” she replied. 

Talking with Steve made her feel better because he was right, it was in the past and it wasn’t like she was talking with him. That was the first interaction she’s had since then with him, and ever since she started dating Steve it was like some kind of bad memory. Throughout the movie, or their make out sessions, she didn’t notice that Billy was sitting in the same row, arm wrapped around another girl who he managed to ignore half the night, glancing over at (y/n) and Steve to roll his eyes. 

After the movie was over, Steve and (y/n) threw their trash away, and as they began to leave, walking past Billy and his date, (y/n) didn’t even look at him, her arm hooked with Steve’s as he suggested they see another movie since he didn’t want the night to be over. 

“Well there’s still the backseat of your car,” (y/n) said suggestively, making Steve smirk and begin to walk faster.

That bothered him, a lot. He left his date, stalking after the both of them. 

(y/n) and Steve didn’t even know, not until he spoke, “You like having my sloppy seconds Harrington?” 

His words hit (y/n) instantly, Steve took a moment to fathom what he just said, and they both turned around, Billy tucked his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket and said, “I promise she won’t moan your name like she did mine.” His eyes flickered to (y/n)’s, “Isn’t that right princess? Where was it, the shower, then my car- that was my favorite-” 

“What the fuck do you want Billy?” (y/n) snapped before Steve could, Billy grinned widely. 

“Oh you know what I want-” Billy bit his lip, and (y/n)’s fists clenched, “Come on, you know you want me again. Why are you with pretty boy Harrington when you had me?” 

“Fuck you!” 

“You already did. Twice.” 

At that point, (y/n) was fuming and Steve was about ready to attack Billy in the middle of this hallway in the theater, but to his surprise (y/n) had slapped him. His head turned to the side, the slap echoing down the hall and others standing in the snack line's heads turned to see what just happened.

Billy’s turned his head back to look at her, “Always the feisty one.” 

Steve had enough, going between her and Billy, “Enough Hargrove, she doesn’t fucking like you so how about you go cry about it somewhere else in private.” Billy chuckled. 

“Oh she liked a whole lot of me, Harrington,” he winked, Steve pushed him harshly backwards that he stumbled and grabbed (y/n) by the wrist gently. 

“Come on,” he said, and (y/n) agreed, satisfied with the slap she gave him. It felt like therapy, really. They started to walk away, but then he decided to open his mouth again. 

“When you’re done being disappointed by Harrington, I’ll be here waiting for you princess,” he said it so smugly and at that moment (y/n) just lost her temper, turning around and practically about to run at him, but Steve was fast, wrapping an arm around her waist and saying, “He’s just trying to get a rise out of you, (y/n)!” 

Billy looked amused at that, wanting Steve to let her go, but Steve kept a firm grip, even though he wanted to see him get punched in the face this time by his girlfriend, but they were in the middle of a hallway with others looking at them, probably about to get kicked out at any second. 

Billy didn’t say anything, eyes glimmering with excitement for some reason. Now Steve wanted to be the one to punch that look off his face. Fuck that guy, really. (y/n) let out a sigh, and looked at Steve, “Let’s just go.” Steve nodded, shooting Billy a glare before they finally left, this time with Billy not saying anything. 

When they were out of the theater, and mall, still holding hands, Steve couldn’t help but say, “You slept with that guy twice?” (y/n), who was still mad, looked at Steve with wide eyes. 

“You said you wouldn’t judge,” she said, frowning deeply. Steve shook his head. 

“And like I said I’m not! Just god he’s such an asshole, you must’ve been really dehydrated,” he said with a shake of his head. 

“I know, I’m so embarrassed,” she admitted, “Also don’t tell Robin,” she said, realizing what a mess that would be, Steve was being oddly nice and nonchalant about it but she knew Robin would roast her to death and she wasn’t ready for that. 

Steve laughed, “I won’t, I promise!” (y/n) sighed.

“I totally ruined the night.” 

“No you didn’t, he did, nobody told him to say shit like that,” he said as he leaned on the hood of his car, pulling (y/n) against him, her hands resting on his chest, “I’ve dealt with that prick before, you know, and I’ll deal with him more if it means defending you and your honor- even though you clearly don’t need it.” He referred to the slap, and her almost pouncing the guy. (y/n) chuckled. 

“I don’t want to get banned from the theater for punching him,” she said, Steve nodded. 

“That would be rough,” he rested his hands on her waist, leaning in to kiss her. She kissed him back, resting her hands on his shoulders before moving them to meet at the back of his neck, pulling him closer to her to deepen their kiss, “Then again, we can still kiss like this anywhere else.” 

“Clearly,” (y/n) said, pecking him on the lips, she leaned away for a second, looking at Steve very lovingly, “He was a mistake, Steve, from a time in my life I’d rather forget. I...I love you.”

Steve looked pleasantly surprised by her words, cheeks turning slightly red, and he smiled, “I love you too.” 

They kissed once more, deeper than the first time and only stopped because a group of teens whistled. (y/n) felt her cheeks heat up, kissing in the dark in the back of the theater was different than kissing out in the open like this, Steve chuckled and moved forward, saying, “What did you say about the backseat before Hargrove interrupted?”

(y/n) smirked and said, “You know what I said.” 

Very quickly the both of them got into the car, Steve speeding out of the parking lot attempting to park somewhere where they can get a little damn privacy.

[thewolfisapartofmysoul]

Hey lovelies,

I got an Dewey Finn x artsy reader for y'all.

The reader crafts this special thing for our Rockstar... fluff ahead.

Hope you enjoy. 💜

Masterpiece

It was a warm summer-day, Nirvana blasted in the background of your appartment when you painted. You wiped your sweaty hairline with a sigh. Glad you decided to put it up in a bun. That way your neck would be cooler, and it also helped you to keep your locks paint-free.

....

You watched your smeared hands and paint stains that covered your overalls. Wel... at last it wasn't in your hair.

You had been painting for about 4 hours now, and you finally managed to step back and be happy with your work. Not often was you pleased with what you created, but since this was gonna be a gift for Dewey... it had to be the best of the best. It had to be absolutely perfect. Your sweet baby deserved nothing less.

You had this idea for quite some time now. But today you finally managed to actually do it.

The idea hit you after the gig-ritual the two of you created.

Dewey came home after a gig a couple of weeks ago and tiredly slumped on the couch with you. Lovingly admiring your sleeping form on the couch.

You always tried to wait up for him, to talk to him about his gig and cuddle. But more often then not, sleep got the better of you. You gave up the battle and fell asleep on te couch.

Multiple times you were woken up by Dewey carrying you to bed while you mumbled an apology for falling asleep while waiting up. Again.

He'd put you in bed, pressed a kiss on your hair and told you it was fine. He crawled in the bed, snuggling closer to you and you would drift off to sleep again. Dewey mumbled how much he had missed you, just before you closed your eyes. You would fall asleep in Deweys warm, comforting embrace.

This was not the ritual you intended most of the time, but it was a nice one nevertheless.

The thought hit you one night, the moment you touched the bed, after Dewey carried you upstairs again. He sighed and mumbled in your hair: "Thanx for waiting up sweetheart... I've missed you so much today."

You decided that he'd miss you less if he carried a piece of you around him, during his gigs, when he rocked the roof of.

Your last thought before drifting off that night had been: Im gonna fix him a special guitar...

That week you ordered a brand new electric guitar for Dewey online, and decided to put your own fingerprints on them... (quite literally). You personally had hand-painted the instrument. A little reminder that he always had a piece of you with him, even when you were not physically around.

You always got a little lost timewise when you touched paintbrushes, and you were startled by the sound of the front door opening. Dewey called when he closed the door: "Hey baby... Im home!"

Shit! Is it already that late?!

You panicked and your eyes darted around the mess in the room. A small explosion would have been a good summary of the scenery in front of you. Paintbrushes and paint scrambled across the floor, old rags to wipe the brushes lay everywhere and you were seated in the middle of the living room, on the ground. The guitar lay behind you, it still had to dry because of the wet paint on it.

There was no way you could keep this a suprise for Dewey. You couldnt even hide the guitar, cause it was still wet...

Damn it!

You realised too late that Nirvana rocking through the speakers would lead him into the living room even faster.

"Hey... babe?" You heared Dewey ask, his footsteps coming closer and you decided: fuck it. No turning back now.

You quickly turned around to face the door, sitting there cross legged and a bit anxcious for a second untill Dewey's happy face appeared in the doorway.

Pleasedontbemad, pleasethinkitscool, Please for the love of the rock gods... just... like it...

His bright brown eyes found yours and he threw a beaming smile your way. "There you are, my little picasso..." Dewey took a step in your direction, pressed a kiss on your hair and mumbled to you "... I still don't know how you managed to do so beautifull, but you got some purple paint in your hair. Again." He chuckled and darted his eyes around the room as he took in the chaos. "If i didn't knew you any better I'd say that you were going for the: mad painter vibe dear... Chaotically perfect. As alway-"

His scentence died abruptly in his throath when he lied eyes on the instrument behind you. His face was shocked, his mouth hang agape slightly and he squeeled. He excitedly bounced over to where you were sitting and a high pitched noise escaped his throath.

"What the fuckeroni is this beauty of a guitar doing here???!!" Dewey managed to croak out in a hoarse squeel. Still bouncing up and down and he ruffled his brown curls in amazement. A smile so bright that it could break his face in half, appeared on his features and he fixated his gaze on you.

Doubt started to creep up your spine as he unmovingly stared into your eyes for a minute. His eyes darted from the guitar, to you and back.

You couldnt take the insecurity any longer and bashfully asked: "Erhm... Dew... are you okay? I... im sorry if i... i dont mean to... erhm... if you dont like it... please tell me..."

You were shut up by Deweys strong arms pulling you up at your waist. Before you could protest or even yelp at the sudden movement his lips crashed on yours. His hands rested on your waist. Between kisses dewey breathed against your lips: "sweetheart... i LOVE it!!!"

He kissed you again, and again and again. Untill you couldnt properly trace his lips anymore, Dewey was a happy, bouncy, excited mess and it was hard to kiss a bouncingball.

You smiled fondly and Dewey rambled on how excited he was, still bouncing around the room. "Baby... you made this??? Its so sick! Its gonna shred faces even before i touched a singe string. Its so beautifull. Its..."

He stopped bouncing and crouched down beside the guitar, suddenly very quiet.

On the side was scribbled: "For my bouncy oddball of a Dewdrop. Rock on...." after the scribble of text he noticed a finferprint. Your fingerprint.

He turned his head towards you and you scratched your elbow, afraid you had overdone it. Your eyes darted to the floor as insecurity crept its way in your chest.

Dewey stood up, very slowly and walked towards you. You didn't dare too look at him untill his deep voice said your name. His voice sweet and caring, made all your doubt wash away.

Your eyes found his and you notices his beautifull brown eyes were gleaming with emotion. His gaze pure adoration and love, acceptence and amazement, when he took your hands.

He smiled through his whirlwind of emotion and reached out to brush his calloused fingers against your cheek, kissed you sweetly on the lips and pulled you in a tight hug.

Holding on like you were his only anchor in the world.

You revelled into the hug and his presence and reached out to comb your hand through his brown messy curls.

You heared him take a deep breath and felt his chest rise and fall against yours. You mumbled against the crook of his neck quietly: "I did it so you dont have to miss me as much on your gigs, Dew... This way you'll always have me with you. Even when im not around."

Dewey slowly pulled back from your embrace and gazed into your eyes. Your hands still tangled at the back of his neck, teasing the hairs there.

His nose rested against yours and he mumbled "...Thank you, beautifull... its... beautifull... almost as beautifull as you..."

He kissed your cheek, his scruff tickled under your cheekbone and he brushed his thumb over the kissed area.

"Its beautifully chaotic and serene at the same time... just like you, dear."

Dewey kissed your lips again softly and when he pulled back he chuckled: "Hey love...?"

You smirked: "Yeah Dew?"

He replied with a soft voice: "...You painted yourself a bit too. Again."

You scoffed at his comment. Of course you did. Again.

Dewey mischievously guided you closer by the straps of your overalls. His thumb brushed your cheekbone again, where he just kissed you. Dewey put his hands on your lower back and continued with a whisper: "No need to paint yourself, love... you are already a masterpiece..."

@ironmansuucks @paxenera @heknowshisherbs @hoodoo12 @large-unit @little-miss-shy-goth @thats-specific @vicunaburger @go-commander-kim @stranger-strings @gegehaddock @bugdrinkss

[thousandsunnywrites]

Mister Sun

⤷ ficlet

part 1 |  part 2

Ace x f!reader; romantic

⤷ synopsis: The only way to calm yourself down was by listening to Mister Sun by Barney. Sounds cute right? Don’t be a clown. This is a n g s t.

⤷ word count: 1,6k

⤷ a/n: aHHHHH heres my comeback from my hiatus 😎hope y’all liked it, i was writing when it was 4 AM and i downtripped to lots of sad songs, remembering how good and youthful life was before I became a boring old hag. das all folks, lemme know what u think as always! (((also im trying this new format just for ficlets/og works teehee)))

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“Oh mister sun, sun, mister golden sun,” Ace cooed as his rough fingers gently combed through your hair, “please shine down on me.” You shift on his lap, clearly still startled from the nightmare, but unwinding as he continues his humming while swaying lightly. 

He was so warm against the cold night.

“You feeling better?” His head lulled a bit to the side, his loud yawn permeating the night air. Guilt bloomed in your chest for waking him up in these delicate hours, but you couldn’t help but need comfort. Your late mother always sang Barney’s song to calm you when you were younger, so naturally it was the only way to unravel your nerves, despite it being a child’s song.

“Thanks for doing this, I know it’s not really your style.” You briefly apologized. He waved it off. 

“No biggie, anything for my girl.” He grinned, his toothy smile shining against the moonlit sea. Your giggle follows right after, his smiles always made you feel like everything was gonna be okay. 

“Love you babe,” you dreamily sigh, still high off broken sleep. 

“I know.”

You nestled your head on the meatiest part of his thigh, and fell asleep. When silence pervaded the air, he pulled you tight to him and closed his eyes. The tranquility of the night made you follow suit a bit after.

All things continued well, you went fishing with Ace the next morning, catching a bigger fish than him and bragging about it to Marco. 

“Cheater!” Ace kept chanting as he demanded a rematch. “You just got lucky, lemme show you how it’s really done.” Grumbling, you acquiesced to his ramblings and hooked on bait.

“Ho,ho. You’re going down, lover boy.” You bore your sole into the wood of the deck, readying yourself for battle. 

“Ready!” He counted down, “Set! Go!”

Fishing lines cast into the sea, a brief moment passing by before a fish tugs on your line first. Messily reeling it in, your feet trip over themselves, cursing as the rod slipped through your sweaty grip. Meanwhile, Ace grunted as he fought against his big catch before victoriously reeling it in. As much as you hate admitting it, you lost.

“Yeah!!” Ace rejoiced, admiring his fish, “we’re eating good tonight boys! Fire up the grills!” The resounding cheers of the crew followed after.

Moments like these, seeing everyone, especially Marco, merrily hammered with booze and seeing Ace mingling with the crowd, occasionally falling asleep, yet his smile never fading. It was moments like these that you wished never left because eventually everything becomes a distant memory.

As a little girl, you believed nightmares disappear after mom sings you to sleep. As an adult, you realized nightmares are never really gone; instead it slowly builds itself in a steady, continuous stream until it becomes real.

It became hell.

The marines took Ace. 

Whitebeard rampaged.

And one thing leads to the other, you find yourself alongside his little brother on the battlefield. Ace looked disparaged sitting atop of the execution platform, protected by the best of the best.

“Ace!” With a determined look raging through his pupils, he grit his teeth and dug his fingernails through the log he was carrying, “We’ll save you! Y/n and I, we’ll save you!” His promise rang throughout the battlefield, commencing the beginning of the end.

The battle ensues, one thing leads to another and Ace is free, running towards freedom. 

Until Akainu provokes him.

“Ha, the loser from the dead generation finally met his time.” The magma man inched closer as the flames flickered off of Ace’s body, angry.

“Take that back.” Ace growled, his white-knuckled fist engulfed in his flames. 

Akainu snickered. “In other words, he’s an eternal loser who will never surpass Roger. Making all his underlings call him ‘old man’ and ‘father’ or whatever.... he got stabbed because his stupid ‘sons’ believed every word he said.”

“The old man gave us a place where we belong,” Ace lunged forward, fist in front, swallowed with rage, “don’t make fun of the old man who saved my life!”

He dodged gracefully, turning on his heel to jab Ace in the rib. They exchange punches, the belligerent admiral having the upper hand due to Ace’s lagging and recklessness. Akainu’s eyes shifted from the fire fist to the strawhat. 

Perfect, he thought, time to end this.

He leaped in the air towards Luffy, the magma on his fist leaving a trail behind him and a smile as wide as ever. He won.

His fist never connected with the strawhat. 

It bore a hole through Ace instead.

Even better.

Overwhelming dread filled the battlefield, especially in Luffy’s unwavering faith, because holy shit you’re not supposed to see right through him. “Ace!” Marco called from the other side, soaring to his side while everyone froze in fear as they watched the events unfold. Whitebeard can only watch in lament, knowing that he did all that he could and it still wasn’t enough. Luffy promised to save him, but why does it feel like he’s the one Ace saved? 

He was there, within your reach. Why couldn’t you do anything? Why didn’t you do anything?

How could you let him die? Out of all the things you could’ve done for him, you cried.

Pathetic. 

He was right there.

You rushed into the rumbling battleground, skidding against the concrete to plant yourself next to him. Luffy’s head whipped to you, holding Ace in his shaking arms. “Y-y/n,” Luffy trembled, and the look in his eyes said it all. He’s dying.

Ace exchanged a few incoherent words with Luffy, so melancholic that he went into shock, mouth agape as his eyes rolled back into his skull.

Swapping places with Luffy, you held Ace’s head on your lap. “Hey, don’t cry,” he brushed the hair clinging to your wet face, “don’t make that face. Doesn’t look like you.” He joked as you pulled him closer to your chest with your foreheads touching and hands shaking as it was on either side of his cheeks, screaming in frustration as tears stained the ground and shamelessly dripped over his face. The warm air contrasted with the coldness of Ace’s body.

“You’re gonna be fine,” your eyes scanned for a doctor, “you’re gonna live, you’ll be fine!” You called out to the nearest medic, asking them to save him. 

“I’m sorry ma’am, it’s already too late, not much to do!”

“Bullshit! You’re a fucking doctor right? What kind of a doctor can’t even save a man dying in front of him?” 

Scared, the poor doctor frantically skirted away, while Ace stared into your orbs, admiring them one last time. “No need to be upset,” he nuzzled his cheek against your thigh, “he can’t save me. Nobody can. My insides are fried.”

“Don’t talk like that!” If he wasn’t injured, you would’ve slapped the living shit out of him. “You’re not dying. I refuse. Get up.” 

“It’s no use.”

You heave up his weight, slinging his arm over your shoulder, only to come crashing back down. The others watched in pity because all you can do was repeatedly punch the ground in dismay like a child throwing a tantrum.

“You can make it!”

“Y/n.” 

“Luffy promised we’d save you and I intend to keep my word.”

“Y/n.”

While watching you trying to save him in vain, unconscious tears wet his cheeks as he bit his lip. It broke his soul to know that he has to leave you like this and there’s nothing he can do to help you. He wants to live. For you. But he knows better than to dream, especially in the condition he’s in. He haphazardly tapped your face with the fading strength he had. 

“Y/n, calm down. I’ll be fine. Please don’t cry. Listen to me, yeah?” 

You nodded, knowing it was a lie, but acquiescing to hear your lover. 

“God, I’m so tired Y/n.” He took a shallow breath before continuing, “I wanna sleep but I don’t wanna go.” I don’t want to leave you alone, hangs on his lips.

This was the end of the line. You knew it was. His stagnant breaths told you so.

All of your movements stop, frustration replaced with empty acceptance. Ace can’t remember you like this, you thought, it’d only be harder for him. “Go ahead,” you manage to show him a forced smile, contrasting against your red nose and puffy eyes, telling him it’s okay. It’s okay to go. He was not nearly convinced, but it was getting harder to fight the sleep overwhelming his crisp body.

“Go sleep,” you encouraged once more, “I’ll be here for you, waiting for you.” You choked on the words as his smile relaxed, eyes fluttering shut. 

“Love you, y/n.”

“I know.”

“Thank you for loving me.”

Clenching your fists, you bit the insides of your cheeks, hoping to drown out the deafening world. Everyone was screaming, but your heart screamed louder. Don’t go, your heart pleaded, I need you. Please don’t leave me. 

But you knew better, Ace would’ve wanted to know that you’d be okay without him. You had to be strong. For him.

This is all that I can do for him.

Before all life left his body, you sang to him one last time, hoping it would provide him as much comfort as it did for you.

“Oh mister sun, sun, mister golden sun. Please shine down on me.” 

The wind gushed by, taking his last breath with it. The end of the beginning was concluding, clearing a new path for a new era in its place. The war raged, filled with metal clashing and the wailing of crestfallen loved ones. 

His vivre card burned, crumbling into thin air, as if it never existed.

Please wake me up from this nightmare.

[evelyn-tries-her-best]

I Should Have Written This Down

Title: I Should Have Written This Down

A Chris Evans x Reader One-Shot

Word Count: 1.8k

Summary: Babysitting your niece and nephew turns into a moment of realization for the both of you.

Warnings: Fluff, crying but the good kind.

A/N: Hahahe she says she’ll post soon and doesn't post for over a month ok I GET it! im terrible at this so far! I didn't even finish the fic I was gonna post last year but here we are. This idea came to me while I was at work and I wrote most of it at work but it was bad, so here it is. Have fun! Let me know what you think. Try not to send me anon hate but I won't blame you if you do.

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Your older sister was out of town for the weekend for her wedding anniversary, so that tasked you with taking care of her kids. You immediately agreed because you loved spending time with them. You did not know how she did it, but she raised both of her kiddos to be absolute angels. Caleb was only 6 years old and he showed more respect and restraint than some adults you know; Naomi was almost a year old but she hardly ever cried or fussed. You loved them dearly. The four of you had had a full day and made it home just in time to make dinner. You and Caleb tasked yourselves to make chicken alfredo while Chris volunteered to put Naomi to bed. 

“Are you sure? I can take her if you want.” You asked Chris, who you loved very much but you knew he didn’t have much experience when it comes to babies.

“It’s ok babe, I got her. Now, Caleb, make sure Auntie Y/N doesn’t make a mess!” He said to the little boy who giggled in response, and with that he left the kitchen. So you and Caleb began to prepare the meal. It took twice as long because you wanted him to learn a lot and to do everything correctly. And as much as you made sure he couldn’t make a mess, the child somehow managed to spill bread crumbs all over the counter and onto the floor. A gasp came out of the both of you, followed by your giggles.

“Little boy?! What did you do?” You asked the worried boy. 

“I’m sorry Auntie Y/N! It was an accident, I promise! I was trying to wash my hands and it was an accident!,” stammered the child, on the verge of tears. You smiled and embraced the boy, rubbing his back while you whispered words of comfort.

“I know baby, you just have to make sure you’re careful in the kitchen ok? It can be a dangerous place in here. Can you put all of the breadcrumbs on the floor with a paper towel, I’m sure Dodger would love it! I’m almost done ok?” you assured him. You set the table and plated everything before you went to check the baby camera. There you see Chris sitting in the rocking chair with Naomi in his arms, who was undoubtedly asleep. While he held her, he caressed her little face with his fingers, going over all of her features. And while you stood there, monitor in hand, images of your future begin to flood your mind. 

You’ve been with Chris for a bit over two years, and you’ve talked about children and marriage so you know he’s in it for the long run. You begin to think about kids of your own, and what raising kids alongside the love of your life could be like. The thought alone filled you with excitement. Your mom always did say that if you wait until the right time to have a child, you’ll end up waiting your whole life. You were both in a good place in your careers, a kid right now wouldn’t be a bad idea, huh? 

Caleb snapped you out of your daydream by asking if he could eat now. You told him to go ahead, you were just going to get Chris so he could join them. Quietly entering the nursery, you nodded at him to let him know dinner is ready. He slowly got up and very carefully set Naomi down into her crib. You creeped up behind him and wrapped your arms around his torso, sighing into his back while both of you stared at the calm face of your niece. You gave him a small squeeze.

“Come on, food’s ready. Make sure the mic is on,” you softly said, while walking towards the door. He lingered by the crib for a moment before following behind you, small breathes escaping him. 

The two of you ate your dinner with the chatty 6 year old for nearly an hour before Naomi began to fuss. You heard the small cries coming from the baby monitor and began to clean up the table, assuring the boys that you had it handled and to please clean up when they finished eating. You prepared a warm bottle for her and picked her up. Cooing and whispering at her, you sat down in the same rocking chair Chris was in and began to feed her. While she drank, your mind began to wander and filling with possibilities again. This time interrupted by Chris who walked into the room right as Naomi was finishing her bottle.

“Hey, how did you like dinner?” you asked. 

“Dinner was great, thank you. Caleb was telling me that he helped you with the chicken?” 

“Yes. Yes he did, did you see the mess he made on the floor?” you both laughed.

“Ha, yeah Dodger was having a blast cleaning up Caleb’s mess,” he chuckled out. He slowly began to crouch next to you, instinctively wiping Naomi’s face. 

“She’s so small,” you whisper “it makes you think.”

“About what?”

“Us, our future.” you waited for his reply. A small silence hung in the air.

“I-It does,” he let out a shaky breath “Listen, I've been meaning to talk to you. Privately.”

“Yeah, me t-too.” You put a burp cloth over your shoulder and began to pat Naomi's back rhythmically. You inhaled, reading yourself to disclose your secret but he cut you off with

“I love you. Babe, I love you so much. I love you more than anything I could have ever imagined I could love. I love your laughs, all 12 of them, I love your face, I love your silliness and I love your boobs and I - I should have written this down.”

You began to tear up, and let a small giggle escape your mouth. He sighed, looking down before continuing.

“Y/N, I love your brain and how good you are with me. And how good you are with these kids. Good god, I see you with them, and it’s like you’ve been doing this your whole life, and it’s not even just you with the kids, it’s you with everything you do. How you seem to bring so much light and warmth everywhere you go. And how much love you have in your heart, there is so much love inside you, and I am so blessed and fortunate that I am one of the things that you love. And believe me Y/N I love you.”

He was rambling, you were shaking. 

“And yes, I 100% should have written this down, but you get my point. But in case you didn’t. Y/F/N Y/L/N. I love you with everything I am made of, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you,” he was already kneeling so all he did was reach into his back pocket for the small box and open it to show you the beautiful vintage ring. You hadn’t realized how long you had been holding your breath but Naomi’s little burp brought you back to life. The roar in your ears was so loud, and you stood up to put her in her crib, sitting her up and surrounding her with toys. You turned to face Chris, who was still kneeling and now with a slightly surprised expression on his face, and you knelt in front of him. You grab his cheeks and stare into his blue eyes, slightly shaking, trying to regain your breath.

“Ask.”

“What?”

“You have to ask, you didn’t ask.”

“Oh shit yeah. My love, will you marry me?” A shaking laugh escapes the both of you, as do the tears.

“Yes. Yes! A million times yes!” You both smiled. Then cried. And laughed. He fumbled putting the ring on your finger. You held each other’s hand, just smiling at each other. You kissed him, trying to tell him how much you love him without words. You kept laughing into each others lips. 

“Uncle Chris? Are you done now? I want ice cream.” You turned to look at Caleb who was giving Chris his best pleading eyes, which only fueled your laughter. 

“Oh gosh Caleb really? Fine! Fine, you know what? Thank you, for waiting that long, that was perfect,” he gave him a thumbs up, “now go back to the kitchen, we’ll be right there big guy.” The young boy walked right back out, running towards the kitchen. 

“Wait, Y/N, you wanted to say something too.”

“Yes but it can wait, I really want ice cream too.” you explained while you tried to stand, but Chris pulled you back down.

“No, babe, tell me.” he whined, pulling a chuckle from you. You held his face, smiling like a love-struck fool, and took a deep inhale. Looking around the room, you kept shaking your head.

“Well, if it makes you feel better, I definitely should have written mine down too. It was going to go something like ‘I love you’, ‘I want to spend the rest of my life with you’, ‘Marriage isn’t something I absolutely need’,” the last statement pulled a look of confusion onto Chris’ face, “Chris, baby. I really want you to know that I was in no hurry to get married, and I know it sounds bad because you just proposed. But I know how it could look. To everyone else, I mean. Because I am pregnant.”

He froze. His eyes bulged out of his head, and he stopped breathing. You just kept smiling, holding his cheeks and giving them a small squeeze to help him come to. It didn’t work, you could see his eyes had sort of glossed over, and he was still frozen.

“But then you went and proposed which completely upstag-” he cut you off with a kiss, pressing his body into yours, wrapping you with his arms, and knocking you off balance. You both fell back, intertwined in each other. You kissed him and he kissed you while you clung to each other, passionately and obviously in love. He finally stopped, and wiped your tears, and laughed. He gave you one quick kiss, before helping you up. You both couldn’t stop giggling, or holding your stomach, or glancing at the ring. 

“I love you Chris.”

“I love you Y/N” He kept giving you quick kisses and small stomach rubs followed by more kisses, it was like you were caught in a loop that neither of you wanted to escape. But a loud crash from the kitchen brought you both back to reality. Quick little steps echoed through the hall into the nursery where you and Chris stood.

“It was an accident I promise! I was trying to get the sprinkles down, but I’m ok! Dodger just has a lot of sprinkles on him now.” a small giggle escaped the little boy while he explained how he dropped the container of sprinkles in the kitchen, before the room erupted in laughter.

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Tags:

@silentcoyotesong - @what-is-your-plan-today - @marvelousqueen89 - @littlemoistcarrot - @jesseswartzwelder 

[emptycanoflizards]

Island Song

Parkner Day 1!! I didn’t actually think that I would successfully be able to publish this tonight, but here we are!! Some sort of messy ending and everything!! Much thanks to @even-dead-im-the-hero for letting me panic and ramble to them about this, and @bellaxbeatrice and @parkneroses for giving me some much needed encouragement <3

day 1: “Road work ahead?” | Word count: 2k | Avaliable on Ao3 here 

“No, sweetheart, I promise. You’re gonna love it,” Harley declared again, smiling over at Peter as he drove. “I’m just saying, the last time that you promised me that, you filled my web-shooters with silly string,” the younger replied, rolling his eyes but eventually sinking into a smile. He couldn’t help himself, he really did love everything his boyfriend did for him. “This is different. Last time, we weren’t in Hawaii, so… yeah. Big difference.” Tony and Stephen had recently decided that the life that they and Peter lived back in New York was too stressful, which lead to Tony booking them all an impromptu vacation to Hawaii. Somehow, Peter had apparently made a good enough impression on Harley’s parentals that they had decided that it was completely necessary to bring him along for the ride, and the older boy could not agree more. Two weeks on a tropical island with his boyfriend? There was literally nothing better in this world. It was only their third day on the island, but Harley had done his research and had the absolute perfect day planned. He had forced Peter out of bed at the ungodly hour of 7:30 am and told him that he urgently needed to get his swim trunks and a sweatshirt on and meet him in the car in 10 minutes. The brunet groaned and moaned but ended up doing exactly as he was instructed, and landed curled up in the passenger seat of the Jeep with three minutes to spare. Harley grinned happily as he silently drove them onto the path to their first destination. “Where are we going?” Peter asked, only six or so minutes into their drive. Harley shrugged knowingly and turned up the music before reaching over and carefully lacing their fingers together. Thirty minutes later, the Harley got off the highway and drove into a small, rundown looking artsy area, which was unusually full of cars for how early in the day it was. Peter sat up and pulled his hood down to glance at the houses that they passed and gave his boyfriend a confused look. “Unless you decided to do some charity work today, I think I’m more confused than when we left the house.” “Just wait, baby,” He said softly, driving into the parking lot of what looked like an antique mall, with less organization and more tables. The blond threw the Jeep in park and smirked over to Peter. “Okay. Get ready to have your tastebuds amazed.” Peter snorted a laugh and rolled his eyes, but as soon as he opened the door, he was shut up. Harley was obviously right. “C’mon, sugar. We got reservations for 8:10.” The two laced their fingers together again as they walked up to a small greeting area, where a plump Hawaiian lady met them. Obviously, they were outrageously busy, so the woman was stressed, but took the time to throw a kind smile at them. “The wait will be 30 minutes to an hour,” she said without thinking, busying herself with menus and silverware for another group waiting to be sat. “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we’ve uh... We have reservations. Under Keener, for two..” Harley said, his lips peeking into a smile as he glanced over to Peter, whose face was glowing with a light pink blush. “Oh!” she said, sounding surprised. She searched through the book and smiled when her finger found their name. “Yes yes. Come on, right over here. Corner booth alright with you?” The boys nodded contently as they followed her to a tiny booth in the far corner, right next to the window to the highway. There were plants hanging in the window, and a small fan sat in the door next to them, and the most delicious smells filled the air. Peter took a deep breath as he sat down across from Harley, who had already begun to hungerly look over the menu. “Holy shit..” The older boy whispered, whistling at all the choices. “Literally everything in here looks so good. I want everything. Think we could get everything?” Peter laughed as he looked over the options. Well, he wasn’t wrong. “We should,” he said absentmindedly, his brain preoccupied with reading the description on the red velvet pancakes. “Wait- Harley, no. Do not get everything!”Twenty minutes later, the table was filled with food of all sorts. Stacks of pancakes were in the middle, Loco Moco filled most of Harley’s side, while Peter stuck with some Kalua pork and more pancakes, this time with guava flavoring and quite possibly the best sauce either of them have ever tasted. It took them nearly an hour to make a dent in the mountain of food, even with Peter’s speedy metabolism, but it was more than okay to both of them. By the time half of the red velvet pancakes were gone, they both were stuffed. Eventually, the hefty bill was brought to them, to which Harley proudly handed Tony’s credit card back. Within minutes, they were back in the Jeep, feeling much more energized and excited for the day.The next stop was somewhat a drive away. The GPS was set for the windward side of the island, which so far was filled with tiny fruit stands, surf shops that looked like they were one hurricane away from destruction, and the most friendly people either of them could meet, which was a very welcomed change of pace as opposed to the New Yorkers that they were used to. Harley had pulled off to the side of the road only twenty minutes into their trip after Peter jokingly suggested that they needed to try coconut milk at least once on their journey. “Harley- what? No! I was kidding!” Peter called out the window of the jeep, already breaking down into giggles as he watched the blond march across the street to vender, which was guarded by a very buff Hawaiian man. If it weren’t for the man’s sudden smile, Peter would have been worried for Harley’s safety. Seconds later, he returned across the street with an armful of fresh fruit, two strange-looking saran-wrapped sushi things, and two coconuts with straws hanging out of them. “I got us some stuff for the trip,” he said triumphantly. He walked to the backseat and dumped the fruit on top of the blankets that were packed in, then motioned for Peter to come out of the car and join him. When they were both sitting on the hood of the car, Harley handed Peter a coconut and leaned his head on his shoulder. The sun was creating patterns on their legs because of the trees above them, which Peter started tracing over, causing Harley to laugh and squirm away with a squeak of “No fair, you know I’m ticklish!” Peter laughed and pulled his hand away in mock surrender, before looking down at the coconut in his hand. “So.. are you gonna drink yours first? Or me first? Or at the same time?” He asked, bringing his eyes up to meet Harley’s bright blue ones. God, the greenery around them and the sunlight above them truly did him some good. He looked absolutely breathtaking. Noticing his sudden staring, Harley ducked down and kissed him softly. Peter hummed a satisfied noise before pulling away. “Are you avoiding this?” He asked, raising an eyebrow before pointing down to the coconuts. “I don’t avoid anything,” Harley responded stubbornly, smirking and taking a long swig from the bright green straw. The reactions were almost immediate- coconut milk was being spat feet away from the Jeep, followed by a yelp of disgust, which leads to Peter nearly falling off the hood with laughter. “Do I-” the boy was cut off by his continuous laughter. “Are you still gonna make me drink mine?” “You think I’m gonna suffer alone?! Sugar, you’ve gotta down the whole thing for laughing at me like that!” Peter scoffed and shoved his boyfriend playfully. “You screamed! Like, full out screamed! Like, dropped your croissants screamed!” He responded, earning a glare, which was obviously covering a loving smile. “You drink it! See if you can not scream.” And so he did. Peter brought the identical bright green straw up to his lips and took a sip. What shocked him was the bitter-sweet taste that washed over his tongue. He turned to Harley, his brows drawing together as he took another drink. This was actually really good! “Was… was yours bad or something? Maybe the coconut rotted?” he suggested, glancing down at the other drink, mainly to dodge Harley’s confused, almost offended look. “No way. You like that? No way.” He picked up the younger boy’s drink and took a short sip, nearly gagging as soon as the liquid touched his taste buds. “Petey, I think your mouth is broken,” he stated, shaking his head as he thrust both coconuts back towards his boyfriend. Peter happily took them back, already sipping from one of the straws as Harley shook his head in mock disgust.The remainder of their morning consisted of a road trip to a secret beach Harley had found out about by talking with the Coconut Vendor Man, in which he had almost gotten them miserably lost (though, neither of them would have actually minded). The older boy was preoccupied with impressing his boyfriend with his singing to hear the GPS instructions to go left on the tiny dirt road that leads them off the highway, so they continued on. Peter was giggling loudly when Harley noticed a sign on the side of the road. “Heh.. Road work ahead? Uh, yeah. I sure hope it does,” he murmured, already giggling at his own joke as they sped on. “Harley, that says road closed ahead.” “Shit.” The car squealed to a stop as they saw said closed road, which leads to Harley showing off a very poorly executed three-point turnaround in the middle of the deserted highway. From there, they paid more attention to the voice of the GPS, which landed them in the most perfect little hide-a-way. They set up the blanket in a sandy grove, which was covered in small trees, just small enough to climb on and jump into the crystal clear water. The fruit they had collected earlier in the day sat with their sweatshirts, tank tops, and sandals under the trees until much later in the day, when they would wander up, soaking wet and cracking up laughing, to take a short refuel break. They continued their swimming, climbing, and fruit-eating routine until late into the night when the sun began to sink into the waves. Harley had built a small fire using dried out driftwood, which was what he claimed to be the one and only skill he retained from boy scouts back in elementary school before Tony adopted him. No matter where he had learned it from, Peter was simply astonished by his boyfriend’s ability. After the fire was settled, Harley opened his arms and invited Peter to come over and cuddle up in front of the newfound heat. The brunette was there without hesitation. The sun continued to set as Harley softly hummed country songs in Peter’s ears, pressing a soft kiss onto the curls on the back of his head every couple of verses. Peter’s dark eyes drifted shut as night surrounded them, the moment too relaxing for them to remain open. ‘I really could get used to this,’ he thought to himself, the combination of the fire and the waves and Harley’s sweet accent enough to slowly lull him into sleep. Only minutes later, the older boy carefully lifted him back into the car, where he wrapped the blanket gently around him and turned on his favorite album, before starting the long drive home. The windows were down as Harley got back to the hotel, letting the salty night time air mingle with Peter’s soft snoring and the echo of guitars from the radio. He looked over to his boyfriend in the passenger seat as he pulled into the driveway of their Airbnb, just taking in his messy brown hair peeking out from his own sweatshirt, the way his lips were slightly open as he slept, how peaceful his expression was, and he thought that he really might be in heaven.

[hotchzier]

louis hadn't exactly planned on waking his boy up until it was exactly half an hour before he had to leave. but with how entangled they were it was deemed impossible to get out of harry's bond without waking him up.

"darling." louis called softly, turning his head a bit back so he could look at him.

"darling, i need you to wake up." louis continued softly, reaching out to move his boys hair back and out of his face. he left his hand to gently rub circles in harry's temples.

he really didn't want to leave.

louis leaned over and gently layed his lips against harry's forehead, attempting to wake him up with his kisses.

"hmph", is all he got out of him.

"baby, i gotta get up."

"mmm". harry dived his nose into louis' neck, inhaling deeply.

louis smiled fondly and moved his hand into harry's gorgeous curls. he always loved playing with them, especially during small moments like these where the both of them are intertwined deeply into their bed. voices never higher than a whisper.

louis gently pulled on his curls in order to lift harry's head up a bit so he could move his lips down to his ear. he nudged it a bit and then whispered at him to wake up once again.

"nnnh-not going to." harry mumbled, still nestled into louis' neck.

louis let out a breathy sound, somewhere remotely close to a chuckle.

"and why is that, my boy?"

"if i keep sleeping, you wont leave." harry eventually whispered with his smallest voice he had.

louis' fond smile slowly morphed into a small frown. he knew how hard these moments were on not only harry, but himself too. he quickly turned the mood to a happier setting by letting out a small chuckle after thinking about the "logic" behind harry's words.

"i wish it worked that way, love." he said quietly, and then leaving a peck on the top of his head to seal his words.

"wanna stay here forever". harry whispered as he moved his head to nose louis' cheek.

louis' chin tilted down a bit so his and harry's noses met to rub against eachothers.

butterfly kisses.

their lips eventually found each others as it seems it's impossible for them not to when their faces are this close.

the first kiss of the day, and most definitely not the last.

they layed there and kissed for a bit. as corny as it sounds, the time always feels endless and that their souls have suddenly turned to immortality when their lips have morphed into each others.

when louis reluctantly pulled pack, harry finally opened his eyes. his usually bright green eyes were a bit dull today but they never failed to catch louis' breath.

their eyes didn't pull away until the realization that the time for louis' departure would be here sooner than later.

louis pulled back to look at the analog clock that rested on their bedside table.

9:22 AM the digital, red letters read out.

he'd have to get going at the latest by 11 and considering how this had been going, it'd be a struggle to get him out of the door until he absolutely had to.

when he turned back to harry his eyes layed upon the frown that had came across his face in the past few seconds. he felt himself frowning shortly too.

god, he hated this. he hated leaving his boy.

louis leaned into leave a lingering peck against harry's lips.

"i love you." he whispered against their touching lips.

all harry did was let his lips curl up to a small smile. he knew he was choking on his emotions deep down inside and he was trying his hardest to conceal them.

"gotta take a shower, love." louis started to get up but harry caught onto his arm before he could even swing his feet off the bed.

"lay with me for a bit longer, please, louis."

his hearth ached. his boys voice was so small and sad. he longed to just quit his job as the aspiring journalist he was becoming and lay with harry in a bed forever.

"can't, darling."

water came across to filling the already glassy, emerald eyes of his.

fuck.

louis didn't realize how hard it would be this time. he'd only be gone for five weeks into the states in order to research on a piece he was doing for the different ways life is lived. but it would be the longest they had ever been away from eachother in the span of the 4 years they were together. he wanted nothing more than to take him with him but they just couldn't.

he leaned in to quickly wipe harry's tears, but he refused to lie down again, knowing he wouldn't get up if he did.

"we'll facetime every fucking day. you can call me whenever you need to, no matter what. and we'll text every minute we can. i promise you, my love." louis stated as his hands held onto harry's face.

harry's hand came up to wrap around louis' dainty, but firm wrists. he continued to look louis in the eye as he nodded slowly. "okay." he whispered softly.

"okay?" louis wanted to hear it again to confirm harry got it.

"everyday." is all harry whispered back.

-

as louis stepped out of the steamy bathroom, he found the still ruffled sheets of the bed to be empty. he followed his feet to the kitchen to see the coffee pot incessantly boiling and harry at the table with his journal.

he seemed to be stuck on his thoughts and aimlessly writing in it, more than likely to calm him.

louis came up behind him from where he was seated and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, inhaling harry's scent and then kissing him once more.

"let me make you some coffee before you leave. or tea? you always prefer tea in the mornings, i just thought maybe you needed some caffeine as you do have a long trip ahead of yo-"

"coffee's fine, sweetheart." louis cut his frazzled rambling off with yet another kiss to his lips.

harry turned around to pour louis a cup and handed it to him as he sat back down with louis.

"nothing for you, babe?" louis asked, genuinely curious as harry usually had a cup as well.

"dont think i'd keep it down to be quite honest". he said as his voice trailed off into some distant land of his mind.

louis sighed and turned his body towards harry's seat. he sat there, drinking his coffee, while reviewing all of harry's features. he never, ever could get over how unbelievably lucky he got with this godly gorgeous boy of his.

"stop staring at me". harry said, his voice fining entertainment.

"i cant". louis knew harry could hear the smile in his voice.

harry disregarded the comment, even though is knowing smile stayed on his face as he turned to asked louis if his toothbrush was packed.

"yes, darling, everything i need is ready to go." he said a but, exasperated. he knew harry was just stalling louis' time but they'd gone over his packed bags at least a million times in the past few days.

"okay, love, just checking." harry said, his voice seemed a big lighter now that he was fully awake, but it still had a sad tinge to it.

10:39 AM the clock hanging against their wall now read.

his ears picked up on harry's breath faintly hitching as he turned to see that harry looked at the same time as he did to.

"still got a good 20 minutes, baby. you'll be okay", he said trying his best to calm his boy down.

he got up to put his cup in the sink he turned back around to harry already standing. his eyes had trailed him the few steps to he sink and now to where louis was walking in his direction.

louis slowly wrapped his arms around harry's long and thin torso. harry felt a bit tense in his arms but he slowly relaxed as louis held him tighter once harrys arms wrapped around his neck and his head fell into his shoulder.

they stood their wrapped up into eachother tightly for a good while, both pulling back with glossy eyes.

it really would be a good time to get going then, but louis couldn't find himself to doing it. he wanted to stay here with his boy as much as his boy wanted him to stay too.

when he looked back up again his face contorted into a frown and his eyebrows pulling together at the sight of a tear rolling down harry's face.

louis took his hands and squeezed them. he leaned up to kiss all over his boys face even has the taste of his salty tears made his way into his mouth.

"i'm sorry." the end of harry's words were slightly cracked by his emotions.

"no, don't be, baby. i just hate seeing you so sad."

"i feel selfish for crying. this is your thing that you've been looking forward to for so long and i just- i don't know we've never been away for this long and im gonna miss you so fucking much." now harry's voice cracks were surreal and tears were unstoppable as he chocked on his sobs.

louis' heart was breaking and he felt his eyes fill up to at his darling boy who was a whole emotional wreck. he wasn't any better himself though.

"you're breaking my heart, baby", louis let go of their intertwined hands to wipe harry's tears out of his face. his hands stayed there to rub circles into his cheeks to calm him down. "i promise you i'll be back before no time and when i get back we can lay in bed and watch movies the whole day like we always do, okay?"

harry just nodded as he tried to suppress his sobs even more. it was pretty much time for louis to be leaving, as he should've been at the airport about ten minutes ago.

"i'm so sorry, darling, but i really gotta get going. ill text you the soonest second i can and you can text me every damn time you want to. these five weeks will fly, my boy."

harry was still keen on saying the bare minimum as he leaned into louis' touch and closed the gap between them to kiss louis' lips for the last time in awhile.

they wrapped eachother into their arms one more time, squeezing extra tightly before louis turned to grab his bags to put them in the car.

harry insisted on helping him but louis refused. he just wanted his boy to rest up for now.

as soon as the doors to his taxi closed his phone dinged with a message from harry, he smiled to himself at how extra his boy was.

"miss you so fucking much already xx"

[donttellpeterparker]

Don’t Get Caught

Summary: Y/n has been giving an assignment... her only rule? Don’t get caught. 

Requested: No

Note: Listen here <-- while you read :)) (Guess you can say I was inspired by this song when I had it on repeat) 

Word Count: 1.5k+

Warning(s)?: Major Violence! Threats, cussing. (Parts later on while have mentions of blood and gore)

masterlist (x) requests (x)

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Part 2

Don’t Get Caught

''Hey she's there get her!" You quickly pulled your hoodie back over to cover your head, twisting your body to begin running down the dark alley way. Making sure to keep the gun hidden in your jacket pocket you reach out to jump over the wire fence. You knew the police where hot on your heels. Remember, Y/N... Don't get caught.

~few hours early

''You want me to do what?'' You asked, your heart racing inside of your chest. You shook your head at the wild idea they had planned for you. 

''H-h-how? There are police everywhere w-w-watchi-i-ng th-a-at place I'll get caught!'' You stutter out, already feeling fear for what your next mission involves. This was the craziest one by far, you've done over a few gas stations, a house and one small bank. You weren't ready for this, no amount of training could prepare you for what you were about to face.

''Well then I hope for your sisters sake...'' Michael walks up to you, bringing out the gun that he often used to help 'persuade' you. Toying with the trigger, carelessly pointing it towards your torso as if all of this was a game to him and it was, to all of them, this was just one huge cat and mouse. 

And unfortunately.. this mouse was going to be lucky to survive. 

''P-p-please give me something else.. p-p-please i'm not read-d-d-y'' You began to cry, the familiar feeling of being consumed from the inside out by fear, no terror. Instead two of his men held you still, grabbing you by your arms making sure you couldn't move. Micheal stepped forward, obviously having enough of your pointless arguing. 

''You stay alive''

~Present

Letting the last tear drop from your eye, you quickly wiped it away with your sleeve. You couldn't do this. How could you possibly go through with this? You were a 15 year old girl with a future ahead of you! Y-y-ou wouldn't survive this... and if you did... your gonna wish you hadn't. 

''You ready?'' You could Cameron's voice speak to you through your ear pierce which was hidden behind a clock of your hair. You forgot that they had eyes and ears on you the whole time, there was no way of escaping. Your mission was... simple. The 'spiderling' as they like to call him have been preventing them from getting the 'alien stuff' they need. Your job? To stop him. How could you possibly stop him? You were human. Well as usual, they were always one step ahead.

You took a deep breath, trying to calm your nerves even a little bit. You where a nervous wreck and why wouldn't you be, you were about to commit a murder. 

''Let's not forgot what we are working for here Y/N'' You nod your head, silently agreeing with him. You had no choice. They had your baby sister and for you she was the only family you had left. Your parents both died in a car accident when you were ten and since then 'these people' got custody over you. How? 

''Yes I know what we are working for...Uncle''

(Flashback)

Peter's pov#

''So are you going to ask her?!'' Ned besides me asks excitedly. He's known you've had a crush on Y/N since the start of freshman year. It was now Sophomore year and she still hasn't noticed you, no wonder though, she was way out of your league. 

''Will you keep your voice down!'' You angrily whisper to Ned. Gosh he's gonna let the whole school know with him blurting it out everywhere!

He looks at me apologetically, putting his arms up in defense. 

''I'm just saying, sooner or later..'' Ned says as my eyes drift down the hallway. There she was, standing be her locker with Liz Allen. God she was so beautiful, so naturally beautiful. I couldn't help but to stare, I mean how could you not? She was the definition of perfect. Well at least in my eyes she was.

''Peter'' I done it again, I zoned out. Ned just chuckles from besides me, finding my embarrassment obviously his source of entertainment. 

''Look just ask her out already man'' He says realizing an annoyed sigh. I shut my locker after collecting my physics book. I turned around and so does Ned, with one last glance towards Y/N I began to walk to class.

''Yeah no way'' I respond. 

''Why?'' Ned asks, seriously not understanding how you have such low game.

''To save myself from complete and utter humiliation that's why!'' How could Ned not see it? 

''Your no worse off if you do'' Ned states, finally leaving my side to head off to his English class. I exhaustively pinch the bridge of my nose between my hand, letting out a frustrated sigh. Ned was right, and that's what made you even more upset. You didn't have any game at all. 

''So are you coming tonight?'' I heard Liz Allen's voice speak, shit that must mean Y/N's not far! 

''Not tonight liz, family plans'' Gosh ever her voice sounded perfect. 

''It's only you and your sister Y/N, Please, there's going to be drinks and lot's of hella cute guys'' Liz speaks. I wonder why she doesn't want to go? I've never really heard her turn down too many parties before. Peter start moving before you begin to look like a creep. 

''I promised I'd have a move night with her Liz'' Y/N says, almost sounding saddened. Saddened? 

''Okay but if you change your mind... just come round'' And with that Liz had stopped talking and walked into the classroom. I didn't share many classes with Y/N except for Physics and Maths. And boy where they my favourite classes out of the lot. 

I was so consumed by my own thoughts I barely felt the bump against my left shoulder. I glanced up confused pulling out one of my ear buds. My eyes widened. Y/N...

''Sorry'' W-w-was she speak-k-king to me? Normally this is the part you would say something back Parker. 

''I wasn't watching where I was going I'm sorry, I have a lot on my mind with the pop quiz and the English assignment which is due that I haven't even started and I missed last nights re run of gossip girl so I won't really find it if Blair marries that guy or leaves for Chuck or-'' All I could was stare at her flustered expression as she rambled. 

''And I'm totally rambling right now, sorry'' She says with a slight laugh. Her laugh. Speak Parker.

''I-i-it's totall-y-y oka-a-y'' Good going Parker. She glances up to you and smiles, thinking she's embarrassed herself like a complete fool. 

''We better uhh-''

''Yeah'' she cuts me off. Why was she nervous? Y/N never gets nervous.

''Are you okay?'' Why Peter why would you ask her that? She probably thinks your such a weirdo now if she hasn't already before. 

''Why would you ask that?'' Does she always answer a question with another question? But damn didn't her eyes look so beautiful in the hall's lighting. Okay that wasn't creepy at all... 

''You seem... on edge?'' I asked, not wanting to push any boundaries, I mean, this is the very first conversation I have ever had with Y/N. Oh gosh wait till Ned hears about this!

RINGGGGGGGGGG 

Whelp that was the bell. I was so worried about the pop quiz coming up that I totally forgot i raced into the classroom leaving Y/N behind.

''You could say that''

(Present)

Y/N'S pov#

''Y/N, you still there kid?'' You were shook from your mini day dream, replaying the events that happened earlier today. You quickly nod your head, glancing to your left and right. 

''Get into place, I'll let you know when to come out'' And then suddenly you heard nothing. Here we go, all or nothing Y/N... all or nothing. 

You began to walk, reaching the destination where you were to remain till you began to hear some chaos, then you were to come out and... stop him. Once you make it inside the closest room you close the door shut behind you and turn the light off, resting your back against the shelves. You were thinking you were beginning to hyperventilate. Resting a hand over your chest you began to count to ten, calming down your breathing which would slow down your heart. Remember why your doing this Y/N... And remember whatever you do-

''Put your arms up now! Behind your head!'' BANG! Don't get caught...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist: @cutie1365​, @luke-the-princess​. @mang0fruitblast​, @that70skiwi​

A/N: Im feeling frisky so I wanna make like a badass/sad imagine set! And yes this is going to be ongoing :))) 

[fionnmeetsharry]

Consume Me

A/N:   Hey guys this is a new story that im starting that is a Harry Fionn vampire AU, hope you all enjoy it. REQUESTS ARE STILL OPEN FOR IN BETWEEN CHAPTERS.

———————————————————————————————————–Chapter 1:The Beginning 

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             Harry’s POV

It had been been ages, well literally for me it had been ages, but also it had been ages trapped there in that place, fighting that battle that I didn’t even have to enlist in. How did I get myself in that God forsaken place? Oh yea I thought it would seem strange if a perfectly able young man like myself were just walking around London while all the others were fighting a battle to save the world, besides it’s not like I could die or get hurt even, I might as well make my immortality productive and put it to good use. But what i didn’t expect was no matter how long I had been living, no matter how much death I had seen in all my days, all the gore, nothing could have prepared me for this, this was different from any battle I had ever seen, this was the humans fight.

 Humans, the most destructive beings on earth. They not know what they truly do, starting not one but two world wars in one century, with young men greedily fighting for survival, but that’s what survival is isn’t it, greed. I know that sounds harsh but that’s also what it is, it’s a bunch of young men that came together to defeat one evil while simultaneously trying to survive, beating each other at who gets to go home first, finding ways to get their before others. Making sure you make it out alive without giving others even a second thought.

That’s what was in store for me next, I just didn’t know it yet. I was actually lucky, I was boarding a boat to finally go home from France, and yea I know I was the last person there that needed to go home that second but people were starting to get suspicious of me surviving deadly wounds and not dying of starvation or dehydration. That was the first time that I had actually smiled since being there, seeing all the men happy and smiling to be boarding the ship. All the starving humans hungrily eating the food that was provided and drinking the water to wash it down before getting more. And then just like that it was all taken from them, and they went from happy to fearful. I could hear it first, the planes coming to bomb us, I could tell by the engine that it wasn’t one of ours either, but what was i going to do, how was I to stop it. There were explosions everywhere, panic filling everybody and chaos taking over. I could hear the deck being blown apart and screams coming from the men on it just innocently waiting to be taken home. I could feel the ship sinking, most people were just jumping overboard but the wounded couldn’t, we had to leave them. And I made the mistake of jumping over on the side of the ship that was slowly making its way towards the deck about to crush anything between the two, and yes I wouldn’t have died but I was too weak to get out of there on my own, and I wasn’t going to let it crush me, that would have exposed our kind. That’s how I met Fionn, I will forever be grateful to him, and now forever stuck as well. “Well Mr. Styles, it seems that our time is up for today, as it was good for you to talk about the war and meeting Fionn, that’s not what I asked you about, you dodged my question again”.

I started Therapy with Dagwood 3 weeks ago, this was our third session. He’s a doctor for special people, not human people, so we can talk to someone and tell them the real things that are bothering us, and him being what he is can see right through me and knows I’m not talking about what’s really getting to me, I just don’t know if I’m ready to talk about that yet.

“I can feel that you think you’re not ready to talk about  your family yet,  but Harry I really think your family could be the root to your problem”.

 “I’m just having a reoccurring dream, that’s all, don’t see what my family s’got to do with it”.

 “Well maybe if you told me what the dream was I could help you overcome it, and from what I can tell from your fear when talking about, it’s more of a nightmare not a dream”.

 “Maybe next week Dagwood”.

“Ok, will Fionn be coming in for a session today?”

“Uhh no, no he’s at uni, living there actually, in a dorm and all. He said something about wanting to try and live a normal human life. He’s attending the University of York”.

 “Ah I see, and let me guess he used his charm to get in?”“Ha, yea considering he’s a 91 year old that looks 19 and his birth certificate is a bit off he kinda had too”.

Dagwood was now packing up his things getting ready to leave as I walked towards the door of his conveniently dark, quaint office.

“That’s better for me anyway, my … niece is moving in today, she’s actually attending the university of York as well”.

I couldn’t help but chuckle at the poor flustered man, I knew she wasn’t his niece and I could tell he could sense I knew. We both exited the office heading outside to the cold Yorkshire air that was filling the streets. Streets filled with humans all bundled up in jumpers, beanies and boots. I didn’t need any of those things, considering I never get cold, but in order to fit in I usually wear a light peacoat with a scarf of some sort. 

Me and Dagwood have been chatting about how maybe Fionn and Solstice, his “niece”, may know each other and he’s still panicking in his head over the fact that I know what she really is. 

“Dagwood, look, your secrets safe with me, I trust you with my deepest darkest secrets, you can trust me with this one”.

 Dagwood smiled at the ground, embarrassed that I knew the truth, 

“I should have known you would have figured it out with your mind reading”. 

“Well I knew you knew with your empathy”. 

“Its why i do what i do”.

Each of us gets a “special” power when we become vampires based off of what we were good at in our human life. You see Dagwood here was good at sensing how people felt, therefore he is now an empath. 

Dagwood is now getting into his car with nervousness and excitement filling him

,“Harry, thank you.. for keeping my secret”.

 “It’s no problem, if anyone understands secrets it’s me”. ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Solstice’s POV I woke up gasping for air, sweat coating my body, I’m now sitting up in my small bed with my heart beating at a thousand miles an hour. I had the dream again, well the nightmare, every night its the same thing. 

It starts off with a beautiful man walking towards me on a deck by the lake, there is a beautiful wooded area surrounding us and flowers filling what there is of ground. The man finally gets to me and sits down, caressing my cheek with the back Of his hand. 

“I’m so lucky to have found you, v’been lookin for you for ages”. 

The mans smiling down at me sweetly as his face slowly moves closer to mine, his breath fanning my cheek as his nose nudges it. He gently places his lips on mine intertwining them as we kiss, I feel a hard pinch on my bottom lip and taste blood, he bit me and is now kissing me with more passion and more hunger than before. 

Suddenly it’s night and we’re in the middle of a field of blood red flower all burning, except a small circle surrounding us where there is no fire. 

My back is now to the mans chest as his hand is wrapped around my throat, pulling it to the perfect angle for better access to my neck, better access for him to bite. Outside of the circle I see two figures in the fire running towards us screaming for the man to stop, the man quickly turns me around, fangs protruding from his gums and the soft green eyes I saw before are now glowing green with veins popping out from below. I scream as loud as I can as the man harshly pierces my flesh with the sharp fangs sucking me dry, killing me.

That’s how it ends, that’s how it always ends, with me dead only to be woken up at 4:00 AM to realize it was just a dream, but the thing is it never feels like a dream it’s always so real, too real. And now there is no way I’m going back to sleep, I never do. I think the cause of these stupid nightmares is this dorm, I started school 3 weeks ago and that’s when these nightmares started, or maybe it’s just England.

I decided that I was just gonna go ahead and get up, I have a big day with moving and all anyways maybe I can just go ahead and get my shower out of the way. Making my way to the bathroom I grab my towel, toiletry bag and what I plan on wearing for the day, struggling to open the door with all the items in my hand only to notice once it is open the room is full of steam, like someone showered.

 “Ahhhhh!”

Finally with all the steam leaving the room through the door that I opened I can see a boy getting out of the shower, a very naked boy. 

“Oh my gosh I’m so so sorry I… I didn’t know anyone was in here I thought this was my own bathroom and well I keep having this reoccurring nightmare so I thought while I was already up might as well sho-“

“Would you please just excuse yourself!”

The boy was trying his best to keep himself covered with just his hands as I made an idiot of myself and just rambled on about why I was awake and why I was gonna shower. 

Quickly exiting the bathroom I scold myself for being so weird, like why when I’m embarrassed do I just ramble on like that. That poor boy has no interest in my life or even any clue about the things I was talking about.

 “Umm, its all yours”.

 The shy boy now fully clothed, opening the door that led to my room allowing me into the bathroom. 

“Thanks, and I’m sorry I honestly didn’t know that I shared this bathroom with someone and I really didn’t expect it to be a guy”.

 He’s  still not making eye contact with me, looking uncomfortable he continues to stand there rubbing the back of his neck,

“Didn’t expect it? These are co-ed dorms”.

 Even more embarrassed than before, I stand there clutching my items as I bite my bottom lip. 

“Ow!”

When I bit my lip it felt just like it did in my dreams when the beautiful man did it. Feeling my lip with my fingertips I look down at the blood coating them. 

“Um you should take care of that, maybe start that shower”. 

The boy is now completely turned away from me, did I really embarrass him that much I didn’t even really see anything. Ok that was a lie but he didn’t know that. 

“No, I just bit myself too hard, it’s fine really…just a little blood”. 

By looking at his back he seems like he’s breathing heavy,

“Hey, are you ok?”

“Yea…yea I’m fine, just got too hot in the shower”.

 “Ok, well I’m Solstice by…the way”. 

As I was speaking the boy rushed out of our shared bathroom, not even telling me his name. 

“Yea that was great…great meeting you too dorm mate”. 

It’s now 10 AM and Blaise has been helping me pack up most of my dorm all morning. Dagwood said that he was gonna continue paying for the dorm in case I wanted somewhere private to crash in between classes.

 “I just don’t understand why you didn’t ask mystery guy to help you, I mean you seem pretty close and all”.

 I rolled my eyes at Blaise, every since I told him about the shower incident he hasn’t let it go, and has made comments all morning. I met Blaise when I first arrived here, he’s the first friend I made…well he’s the only friend I’ve made but we’re already really close.

 “Blaise, I don’t even know the guys name and I met him for like 2 seconds, that’s not close”.

“You’ve seen each other naked, doesn’t get much closer than that Sol”.

“For the last time we did not see each other naked, I saw him naked”. “But you were both in the shower”.

 Ok now he’s just pushing it, he knows how the story went, he’s just trying to get under my skin. 

“No, we weren’t. He was in the shower I walked into the bathroom”.

 Blaise put his hands up in defense

,“Ok, ok whatever you say”. ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Fionn’s POV

She was having the nightmare again, the girl, my dorm mate. I don’t know if she knows it, but every time she screams in the dream she screams in real life. I’ve had to charm everyone in this building to forget about the scream every time they hear it. I just don’t want attention to be drawn to myself, I’m trying to stay low. 

With being a vampire my senses are already heightened, but with also being an empath not only are my own senses heightened, but everyone else’s around me that I can feel. I’ve learned to deal with it mostly over the years, but every night when she has that dream an insane amount of fear and pain fill her, then it’s multiplied by ten for me. 

That’s why I was in the shower, I get in the shower every morning around 4AM when she’s having the dream, the running water helps me calm down, the sound drowns out her feelings that are running through my head. I grabbed my bag and phone before I left my dorm, I had a big history test this morning, well I guess not really big for me since I lived it. Right outside our dorms is my neighbor and some guy, they’re packing up what looks like things that would go into her room. Is she moving? She can’t be moving it’s only been 3 weeks. I feel an urge come over me to ask her to stay, for some reason I don’t want her to leave, and for some reason I really don’t like her laughing with that guy. God her laugh, it’s the most beautiful thing I have ever heard, she has the kind of laugh that makes you feel warm and happy, safe, the kind of laugh that makes you want to laugh. What am I saying I don’t even know this girl, I must be feeding off of that guys emotions.

“Hey, Solstice’s dorm mate guy!”

Oh no, why is that guy calling me over? How does he even know I’m her dorm mate?  

Solstice is now trying her best to hide her face and act like she can’t see me. Was the situation really that bad this morning?The guy continues to call for me so I head over towards the two. I make it to the both of them and Solstice still won’t look at me.

 “Hey Solstice”.  

She looks up from the curtain of hair blocking her face from my view,

“Hey..”

“Uhh, Fionn, its Fionn”. 

She gave me a quick smile, now fully looking at me, God she’s gorgeous. 

“Fionn, look again im sorry about this morning I really didn’t know”

“It’s fine, promise”. 

I cut her off from her rambling, I could feel how flustered she was getting.

“Are you moving?”

“Yea, well mostly. I’m going to live with my uncle but he’s going to continue paying for the dorm in case I need some privacy while on campus”. 

“Oh that’s cool”.

 Suddenly I smelled it, it was the same scent from last night when she bit her lip, she was bleeding.

 “Shit, it’s  like I just can’t seem to stop bleeding around you”.

 I could feel myself losing control, I quickly turned around hoping I could calm myself down so I didn’t  have to run again.

 “Sol what the hell did you do?”

I could feel that guy whose name I still don’t know moving towards her to check on her hand.

 “I just cut it on the side of the truck, no big deal”. 

I could feel the hunger taking over me, I had to get out of here, I haven’t fed in over a month.

I quickly ran towards to the woods and as soon as I was out of eyesight I orbed myself to Harry’s apartment. I knew he kept a stash of blood in the deep freeze.

 Appearing in his apartment I was grateful that he wasn’t here, he would have scolded me for not taking care of myself like I should, he probably would make me move back in with him. I grab a blood bag and immediately suck it down. I can feel the hunger slightly ease but really all I wanted was her, there was an urge in me to just turn back around and have just a taste, but I knew I couldn’t. I would lose control. ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••      Solstice’s POV 

When I finally look up after cleaning my hand from the blood, Fionn is gone. Why does he keep doing that, running every time we are starting to have a good conversation. Maybe he’s just not good with blood, I was bleeding both times.

“C’mon Sol, we got to get to Dagwoods”.

 I hop into the truck with Blaise as we head off to my uncles home, well Manor is more like it. I can’t help but to think about Fionn, I’m not sure why he’s all I want to think about but he is, there’s just something about him that pulls me to him. The stupid voice in my head is telling me that it’s because I saw him wet and naked, but that’s not it.

We finally arrive at the manor, Blaise is helping me carry my bags in as the front door opens. 

“Dagwood!”

I drop my bags to run up and give my uncle a hug. My uncle means a lot to me, him and my aunt Valeria.

My parents died when I was a baby, I don’t even remember them, so my aunt took me in and we lived in America. My aunt was my moms sister, Dagwood is my dads brother. Even though I didn’t get to live with him when I was younger, he always came to visit the states and see me.

“Solstice, you’re beautiful as ever”. 

I missed him, he smelled familiar, which is something I miss since the move, familiarity.

 “Well c’mon, lets get inside, I want to hear everything since the last time I saw you”.

 Blaise, Dagwood and I all grabbed some bags and headed in. “Hey Harry, come down here there’s someone I want you to meet. Harry is one of my clients and after our session today he called me and asked if there was anything I needed help with with the move, so he’s been putting together your bed”. 

We hear footsteps coming down the stairs, as the man makes his way to us he makes eye contact with me. No, it can’t be, it was the same beautiful soft green eyes from my dream, he was the man from my dream. I felt weak, lightheaded ,the room was spinning and I felt like I couldn’t breathe. The next thing I know the man is rushing past me with my uncle calling after him. Black spots are starting to fill my vision as my uncle calls my name asking me if I’m ok. Dagwoods worried blue eyes are the last thing I see before complete blackness. 

[ask-joeydrewstudios]

((this is totally subject to change at random and I don't know when or how or if it even will (probably as canon becomes more clear haha edit from the future, My City Now, canon is void regardless this is actually more or less how it happened) so I'll just give you the current version. Its a little cliche but hey I will write this AU as I please xD weird blend of rambling and fic under the cuttt because i dunno what im doing anymore))

  So it's 1928, and Joey Drew Studios had just released its first animated short. Oh boy, did it take off. It was picking up attention like nobody's business, and one of the people who it had taken the attention of was a then 15 year old Henry. He was already skilled with a pencil and interested in drawing, it was something he loved dearly and had been doing for a long time. He always had a sketchbook and at least three pencils on him, and he would draw at every given opportunity. This included on public transport, which is what would lead to what he calls one of the greatest moments of his life.

  He sits down on a train one afternoon and, with not much else to do, pulls out his sketchbook and a pencil. He still had that cartoon on his mind, it had been a few weeks and he was still thinking about it. He'd already filled a few pages with doodles of Bendy and other cartoony looking characters drawn from memory or imagination, and he was looking to fill another during the hour long train ride. He had a page he had started the night prior, so he got back to work. It wasn't long before the man sitting next to him closed his own book and expressed an interest in what he was drawing. Not much longer after that they were having an entire conversation based around art and animation and what Joey Drew Studios had been doing, all while Henry showed off the other toon drawings he had done, as well as some various studies and drawings. The guy seemed quite impressed with his work, and was even more impressed to hear that Henry was of such a young age.

  "Nice to see someone like yourself so passionate about drawing, and already so far along in mastering your craft." He had said with a chuckle.

  "Of course sir, there's nothing more in the world I love more than drawing."

  The conversation continued, and near the end of the ride Henry mentioned how he'd like to work at the animation studio one day, but he thought it was unlikely since they probably had high standards and dozens, maybe hundreds of other people probably looking to get in.

  "I wont stop dreaming, though. You never know what'll happen..." Henry’s gaze wishfully drifted up from his sketchbook and to the window across from him.

  "That's a good attitude to have, and you're quite right: you never do know what could happen." He paused. “Could I see your sketchbook for a second?”

   “Uh, sure, go ahead.” He handed the pad of paper over, and the man produced a fountain pen from his coat and flipped to the very back page. He began to write something, Henry couldn’t see what from the angle the sketchbook was held at. He finished writing, and handed it back to its owner.

   I don’t think I’ve met anyone with such a clear passion for drawing as you have, and you’re already quite skilled. I’d like to stay in contact.

   There was a mailing address, and a phone number.

   Best wishes, Joey Drew

  In the corner of the page there was a small doodle of Bendy, smiling and winking. Henry stared at the page confused for a moment, and then it clicked. He looked back up at the man, looked properly at his face for the first time which he'd kept partially obscured under the brim of his hat and a popped coat collar until now...

  Yeah. Never know what'll happen. He'd just spent the past 47 minutes talking to Joey Drew himself and he didn't realize it until now.

  ...he'd just spent the past 47 minutes being a total dork to Joey Drew himself. Oh god, what were the odds?

  "You’re-”

   “Yup!” He cut him off, not wanting him to announce his presence to the entire train. He offered his hand. “And you would be...?”

   Crap, all this time talking and they hadn’t introduced themselves. He couldn’t tell if he was making a great first impression, or a terrible one.

   “Henry.” He shook his hand, despite the fact that his own were shaking. “Pleasure to meet you.”

  "Likewise.” Joey leaned towards him with a smile and spoke in a hushed voice. “Maybe when you're a little older, and you've gotten even better, you can come work with me at my studio like you said."

  Henry was almost in tears, still in awe at the fact that he'd met The Man Himself somewhere as undramatic as a train. He shook his hand, and he had offered him a job. His dream job. This is not at all what he was expecting when he woke up this morning. All he could do was nod as Joey quietly went on about how he loved his energy, and how he felt they were destined to work together. He wouldn’t tell the kid, but he reminded him of himself in a weird way. He knew if he didn’t make the offer, their paths may never cross again and he’d regret it for the rest of his life.

   They kept talking until the train stopped, and Henry had to leave. Part of him didn't want to get off the train, but part of him did if only to finally be able to calm down. Joey sent him off with a pat on the shoulder and a smile, and when Henry took one more glimpse of him right before exiting the train he saw him give a little wave, and he returned with his own slow, shy wave and a dorky grin. Joey kept his smile as he returned to his book, Henry freaked out to himself the entire walk home while clutching his sketchbook to his chest, and his parents didn't hear the end of it for weeks. They kept in contact through the phone and letters, the latter of which always had little doodles contained within them. Joey encouraged him to keep drawing and would give advice on art and later life itself when Henry came to him with troubles, and Henry would make sure to keep up with as much studio news as possible and would give his thoughts on any new cartoons the studio produced. He saw them all multiple times. Some of his thoughts even ended up having an impact on future cartoons. Joey wasn't supposed to, but he would share extra information about them sometimes - unused ideas, things they had to cut, all that Cool Behind The Scenes stuff. The second he was able, Henry went off to work at the studio like he'd dreamed for what had been years at that point. Joey was happy to have him. They've been working together ever since.

Like I said this is entirely prone to change because we know so little about their history in canon. As much as I love the “Joey and Henry were friends before Bendy was a thing, and they made him and the studio together” idea, I like the “Henry found Joey through Bendy’s success” idea just a little more :P henry met joey because he was drawing fanart of his oc on a public train and ended up working on the cartoons he was such a fan of. honestly, goals.

also i low-key might not change this even if canon contradicts it because its really precious and wholesome and this is an au anyway. this blog’s gonna turn into a game of “just how far can I pull this out of the way of the game’s canon...”

[james-a-b]

hey you don’t mind if i unload a fuck ton of shit on u do you?

good thanks i didn’t think so. today i’m talking about shit friends and the reasons i am one of those. this is gonna be a long ass essay so buckle in

right so i guess writing is cathartic and the entire idea of a therapist is to have someone to unload your shit onto. This is like, free therapy. so thanks in advance, or whatever.  this is going to be a long, rambling essay on Why Im A Shit Friend, and i’m going to start by diving right into the deep end with the shit that went down around Caitlyn. Next up will be Lyssa and why i don’t deserve such a great best friend, and then so on, and finally my conclusion. i don’t really give a shit who reads this right now, so if ur curious go the fuck right ahead

a lot of shit went down with Caitlyn in grade 12. she’s... she was one of my best friends, from 12 to 18, and i miss her. i also tried to call her today, but i think she still hates me. What happened was this: there was a boy. i know how that sounds, at first, but neither of us had any romantic interest in him. he’d been our friend since grade 7, and was closer to Caitlyn than me. I guess he’d decided he liked her sometime while i was away at private school (i was gone for five years), and instead of being a normal human and respecting her refusal he decided to pester her until she said yes. She never said yes, but she did cut him out of her life as much as she could. And then I walked back in, not knowing why they weren’t talking. I asked so many times, and neither of them would answer. Caitlyn told me i shouldn’t be friends with him, and that just made me confused. I didn’t take her seriously, because i didn’t know what had happened. so i kept talking to him, and she drifted away from me.

i suppose she cut me out of her life as well because she felt hurt that i didn’t listen to her. i should have, but how could i have known when she wouldn’t tell me what he’d done? For all I knew they could have had a disagreement about which zelda game was the best or something. Caitlyn was both stubborn and dramatic, after all, and Jory behaved as though whatever happened wasn’t a big deal. so I didn’t listen to her, she cut me out of her life, and then Jory got a crush on me. And again, instead of being a normal human, he tried to trick me into saying yes. I endured months of this, because i am nothing if not loyal to my friends, but it came to the point where everything was soured by him. So I did what I had to do and cut him out of my life. It was hard. We’d grown close over that year, because neither of us had other friends who weren’t busy or hiding from us. 

But I cut him out of my life, and i called Caitlyn, because she had done the same thing and i wanted to complain about him and tell her that she was right. she was.. very cold on the phone, though i didn’t know why at the time, and that was the last time she answered a call from me in over a year. I didn’t realize she was purposefully ignoring me at first. it took me about eight months to realize, actually, because we rarely called each other but when we did we would talk for hours. I figured I was just calling at the wrong times. 

I got in contact eventually, having accidentally embarrassed her into accepting my call by trying to fix things in public. I don’t regret it much, because we needed to have a talk. I missed her friendship so much. And i called that night, and found out she was angry at me, because i didn’t listen to her warning. i hadn’t once considered this might be the case, had just assumed she was avoiding me because i kept talking about him. we had a talk. I cried, i wanted us to try to be friends. She was more than a little reluctant. I can understand why, but nothing that happened was anything i wanted. if i could go back in time and heed that warning, i would.

it’s been half a year since that phone call, in which she eventually said that yes, she would let me try to fix our friendship. Today’s call was the first since then. I was kind of upset with her, too, for being willing to cut me out of her life over this. I didn’t want to call until I could forgive her, and she never called me. I don’t know if we’ll ever manage to fix our friendship, which was once one of the closest i’ve ever had.

i contacted Jory after eight months of silence on my end because i wanted to show him i didn’t need him in my life. I wanted him to know I was moving on. But i kept contact, and while i haven’t forgiven him for what he did to Caitlyn and I, he is my friend. And I don’t treat him well. He is the sort of friend who will go along with whatever you say, for the most part. And I boss him around a lot, i think. I never want to hang out in person. Sometimes i feel like i am using him as some sort of placeholder friend, like i’m waiting for someone better to come and take his place in my life. And whatever he has done, that’s not fair to him. And i hate doing it, i hate feeling like i’m doing it, but i don’t know what else there is. This is how our friendship has been for a long time, all teasing and banter and me bossing him around, and sometimes it feels wrong but I don’t know what to do about it. I tell him close to everything, i am more open with him than i am with any other friend, he probably knows me better than my best friend does. But he isn’t my best friend. I tell him these things because, quite simply, he’s there to listen to it. 

My best friend is always busy, it seems. I love her, but we rarely hang out, and we never talk about important stuff. I wish we could. I want to tell her about the scars i inflicted on myself when i was younger, and the empty feeling i get when my depression hits, and i want to talk to her about the things that interest me. And i want her to do the same in return. We’ve been friends since we were six years old, but there have been years in which we didn’t talk at all. I think the entirety of middle school went by without contact between us, and I am truly only in contact with her now because our moms were friends, and our sisters. I remember being in grade four, asking if we could play sometime else because i was in the middle of a book. I wish i’d put the book down instead. It’s seemed like she has been busy ever since then. I don’t think I even know what her favourite colour is. She knows mine is blue.

I am gratified by the fact that Lyssa’s anxiety doesn’t stop her from letting me see her at her worst, but I can’t help but wonder how I could possibly deserve that. I didn’t try to keep in touch or make time for her when we were younger. I should’ve. God, i should’ve. I wasn’t there for her when her dad started being a worse asshole than before. I Wasn’t there when her parents split, or when her dad left town, or when she broke up with her boyfriend for the first time. I didn’t even know he existed until they’d been dating on and off for a few years. But she says I will be their child’s uncle one day, and I will be her man of honour, and I don’t know how i could possibly deserve this.

In grade 9 i dated a boy. He was just like me, only (i thought) the opposite gender, and maybe with a few mental problems I didn’t have. We were good friends, but I didn’t like him romantically. It was my first experience with anyone liking me, and i didn’t know what to do, so I agreed to be his girlfriend and wished the feelings would grow from there. They didn’t. A year after that his tics got so bad he switched schools, and i haven’t spoken to him much since. I regret that. We were so similar, and i believe it’s rare to find someone like that. We could have known each other as well as we knew ourselves, if we had time and talked about important things instead of playing tag or whatever we did.

To summarize... I’ve managed to fuck up all of my close friendships in some way or another and god i hate it. i wish i could go back to before things went wrong with anyone. Maybe some things can be fixed, but the lost time can never be regained. And if i could only say these things out loud, if everyone i’ve wronged understood that i didn’t mean to, if they could forgive me for being so shit? well. i’d still not deserve them. And maybe that’s depression or insecurity talking, but does it really matter? It’s true.

glad we had this talk, or something. bye

[highbuttonsports]

HB journey - Through the eyes of the idiot behind the camera.

Whats up, CrushDouder checking in. Going to give this blogging shit a try. I always seem to find myself in disputes or deep conversations with people and giving my opinion on things, so I figure I mid as well put it down for others to read. Before I get into the nitty gritty I’m just gonna give a little insight on my journey so far with the High Button. I’ll probably ramble on but that’s what happens when ya try and write a blog after a little electric lettuce! Up, up & away!

STOP! I know what you’re thinking “Douds is an idiot”. You’re not a hundred percent wrong, I'll be the first to admit that. With that being said, hopefully you’ll be pleasantly surprised after reading this that you’ll think, shit, I enjoyed that! Maybe he’s got a little more going on up top than I thought….If not, I really don’t give a shit hahaha.

I’ll first start off by thanking Belly for allowing me to be apart of the High Button. Listen… If you were to tell me a year ago that this year we were going to be working Red Bull Crashed Ice as a media company, at fucking Fenway Pahk…. You kidding me? Or that we would be media credentialed at the Telus Cup in Thunder Bay or better yet the god damn Memorial Cup in our great city of Halifax, doing bench interviews during warm-up (even though we weren’t supposed to.) I would have laughed in your face, seriously. I’ve lived in Halifax my whole life and not once, did I get to sit in the press box for a game. Not even as a healthy scratch hahaha. I don’t care who you are, that is a special moment in your life. Especially an ex hockey player, who just didn’t quite make it! Almost makes you feel like a kid again.

It's funny ya know, how you end up down paths in life that had originally never been thought of. A couple years ago, I was driving a 5 tone truck slangin’ pallets all over the city. I was content enough doing that work as it paid pretty well, and it was something different everyday. After I left that job due to something I considered unfair treatment and unprofessionalism at its finest. Imagine that.. Douds thinking something was unprofessional. Do I even know what unprofessional is? Thats how bad it was, believe me.

So I’m in a rut y’know, standard shit for ol’ Douder, back on the job hunt once again. I felt like I was at that period in my life that you consider like, the cross-roads or something stupid like that. So I’m like; “What am I gonna do for the rest of my life” kinda thing. I’ll be honest with you guys, that thought never really lasted long in my head. My give-a-fuck level is pretty low, too low in some people’s mind I bet but it’s just my way of dealing with things and not sweating the small shit. Blah blah blah.

I don’t know if Belly knew I wasn’t working or maybe it was just a known thing that I wasn’t.  Maybe he was just so desperate, he dug to the bottom of the barrel. Either way, who cares. He asked me to come on the podcast as a guest. What a great move by him wha?? I consider myself to be non-filter,  so why not have me on to stir the pot a little eh. Ive made a ton of friends over the years through sports and I think that helped in a sense as well. Anywho, I end becoming the co-host on the podcast and then the camera guy…Let me pause you for a second here. Being the camera guy is not as easy as I thought, I figured oh ya, turn it on, zoom in and out and Bobs your uncle (or Aunt)….Wrong. There is a certain anticipation you have to have, a certain creative eye if you will. Don’t get me wrong you don’t need 13 years of secondary education to run a camera, just wasn’t as easy as I thought.

Like I mentioned earlier, its funny where life takes ya sometimes…

Fast forward a bit into the High Button. The first couple months were crazy, we didn’t know what we were doing. We had tons of podcast guests that summer, I mean Christ, were just over a year into this and we're up over 200 episodes. Thats some impressive shit I don’t care who you are. It honestly takes a while to really figure out what you’re good at as a company and finding what the viewers will like as well. And I think we're well on our way.

So, the fellas are in their groove and everything seems to be moving smoothly but I just wasn’t happy with my lack of knowledge in the industry, so what do I do? I apply to take a Media & Communications course at NSCC and wouldn’t ya know it…. I get in. Twenty-seven year old freshmen. Has a nice ring to er wha?! Here’s the thing, sometimes ya make decisions that may be out of your comfort zone, but how else are you going to grow as a human being?? So fuck it, I did it! I won’t get too much into the school stuff as that’s not my bread and butter. Plus, I didn’t enjoy it as much as I thought I would. There I said it…

What I do want to mention though is how fun this process has been so far. And how it has helped me kind of find a sense of what I want to do with my life or maybe just created a new found confidence in myself, either way, I’m gonna roll with it. This has enabled Belanger and I to stay close to the game we both devoted our lives to. It allows us to really cherish and celebrate everything the Maritimes has to offer. It allows us to go down new, different avenues and learn new skills and branch out into new sports, new cultures that kinda shit!

Im looking forward to the path ahead with HB. The ups and downs and the successes. The spontaneous road trips to the days sitting in Belanger’s basement contemplating whether or not this is going to work. I truly enjoy it and I know for sure Belly does too. When you enjoy something enough the passion and commitment almost comes naturally. Maybe that’s just me, I don’t know. One thing I do know for sure is that if this ships sinks (which it won’t) it won’t be for lack of effort or caring. If everyone could see the amount of effort and not to mention, time put into this by not just me but especially Belly. I’m sure most of you would be a little shocked. I know I certainly was at the beginning!

Last thing I’ll touch on. Shout out to all the people who believe in us and continuously like, share, watch and god forbid converse with another human being about. (old school I know) Thank you. To the guests who’ve given us a couple hours of their time and allowed us into their world and allowed us to help them share their stories for the people to hear. Thank you.

Special shoutout to every member of the 2018-2019 Halifax Macs team for allowing us to be apart of your journey with your sons this year. Your guys’ support has been unbelievable from the beginning and has allowed us to pursue another lane of this media world! Thank you.

Keep supporting the High Button and we will continue to support you!

Cheers,

Douds